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The Ten Habits Of Highly Healthy Homes
Lesson 4: Renew Your Relationships
Exodus 20:8-11
8 Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
9 Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work:
10 But the seventh day is the sabbath of the Lord thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates:
11 For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the Lord blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it.
Do you ever get tired just thinking of all the stuff you have to do?
Do you ever bring work home with you or use the weekend to catch up?
Do you ever feel guilty when you relax? YOU’RE NOT ALONE!
1 in 5 Canadians work more than 60 hours per week.
2 in 3 employees say that their job is causing them to “unravel.”
1 in 50 feel they are on the verge of a breakdown due to their job.
Today we’re going to look at what God has to say about taking a day off. That’s what this commandment is about.
To the modern mind, such downtime seems ludicrous: “Just in terms of allocation of time and resources, religion is not very efficient. There’s a lot more I could be doing on a Sunday morning.” – Bill Gates, quoted in Time Magazine.
“Most middle-class North Americans tend to worship their work, to work at their play, and to play at their worship. As a result, their meanings and values are distorted.” – Gordon Dahl
It’s interesting that God has more to say about taking a day off than He does about either murder or adultery! But God knew we might not take this one seriously, so He expresses His wishes intensely. This is the longest of the Ten Commandments. God is saying, “This is not a suggestion, I am commanding you to take a day off every week. I don’t want you, your children, your servants, your animals, or your guests to work on the Sabbath day!”
God makes it clear in His Word that for human beings to function optimally over the long haul, to maintain an attitude of joy and peace, a positive perspective toward God and other people, and physical and emotional health; they have to break out of their weekly routines.
An automobile will run longer and better if you keep it on the maintenance schedule recommended in the Owner’s Manual. That’s the way it is with human beings, too… and the Bible is our Owner’s Manual. It says, “Take a day off every seven days!”
God told us, 2000 years ago, what production analysts have concluded only recently; that reasonably spaced work breaks increase productivity. Statistics show that after approximately 40 hours of work, concentration levels drop, mistakes increase, and morale takes a nosedive. Even one’s health is affected, with workaholics leading the charts in work-related disorders such as high blood pressure and premature heart attacks. If we refuse to cease from our labors on a regular basis, we will inevitably experience the telltale signs of an impending breakdown.
More than our bodies need a break! In our technologically advanced society, fewer people experience the physical stress of battered muscles and calloused skin. Many, however, experience the emotional stress that accompanies a schedule filled with too many people and too many demands. They need what God says they need; a break!
Defining The Sabbath
What is it? The word “Sabbath” simply means “day of rest” or “to cease.” When God created the world, He wasn’t exhausted on the seventh day, but He abstained from work to set a pattern for us. The first six days were “good,” but the seventh day was “holy.”
When is it? God says that we are to take a Sabbath every 7 days. The Muslim Sabbath is Friday, the Jewish Sabbath is Saturday, and the Christian Sabbath is Sunday. But not one verse in the Bible commands us to worship on Sunday. So why are we here? Because Jesus rose from the dead on the first day of the week, the “Lord’s Day.” (Rev. 1:10)
Romans 14:5-6
5 One man esteemeth one day above another: another esteemeth every day alike. Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind.
6 He that regardeth the day, regardeth it unto the Lord; and he that regardeth not the day, to the Lord he doth not regard it. He that eateth, eateth to the Lord, for he giveth God thanks; and he that eateth not, to the Lord he eateth not, and giveth God thanks.
Why is it? The Sabbath is God’s antidote to burnout! It is a day of “RE-CREATION” more than just recreation, a time to rejuvenate oneself. It is not only about time off, but also about sacred time. (It’s obvious that cultivating a relationship with God necessitates much more than a weekly “check-in.” God calls His people His Bride, and it is ridiculous to think of trying to build a strong marriage by visiting one day a week! But, one-day SET ASIDE for God is still irreplaceable!)
Mark 2:27 And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath:
Exodus 23:12 Six days thou shalt do thy work, and on the seventh day thou shalt rest: that thine ox and thine ass may rest, and the son of thy handmaid, and the stranger, may be refreshed.
Illustration: Perhaps you’ve seen film of some of the early attempts at manned flight, with mustached gentlemen in their Victorian suits flapping wing-like contraptions, peddling belt-driven propellers, and bouncing around ridiculously in useless gyrocopters. They are amusing now, but they weren’t back then. Many people lost their lives in the search for the secret to flight. The reason they look so silly to us today is that they didn’t understand the fundamental principle of flight. Today we understand that their flapping, running, and jumping was useless. It wasn’t until the Wright Brothers learned how to apply Bernoulli’s Principle of Pressure Differentials using a curved wing edge that take-offs stopped looking like a clown act, and the course of human history was changed on December 17, 1903 at 10:35 a.m. Before that, those well-intentioned aviators could not have succeeded, because they weren’t dealing with reality. They had a faulty theoretical model, so they couldn’t get their contraptions to fly!
Discovering the meaning of the Fourth Commandment is a lot like the Wright Brothers’ breakthrough. The Sabbath is all about the way God has constructed us. In order to function successfully, we must understand its principles and apply them. We will never “find time” for the important things in life, we must “make time.”
Rocks Illustration: The container represents a week of your time. The small rocks represent all the things you normally do in a week. The big rocks represent family time and other things that are really important to you, things you should do, but have a hard time fitting into your schedule. Your task is to fit as many of the big rocks into the container as you possibly can. But you can never get them all in! You need a paradigm shift; put the big rocks in first! If you don’t put the big rocks in first, they hardly ever fit in.
That’s why we need a Sabbath, a time to re-evaluate what we’re doing with the “big rocks” of life!
Some people say, “I spend quality time with my family, not just quantity time.” But quality time doesn’t always happen when you want it, simply because people are not always ready for it. It is in the quantity of time that the most quality moments will accumulate. Quality time comes when you least expect it!
God has two words for time: CHRONOS, which means “time governed by the clock” (QUANTITY time) and KAIROS, which means “time measured by special moments” (QUALITY TIME).
The key is that you have to take advantage of KAIROS time at the moment it happens, or you lose it forever.
Luke 19:41-44
41 And when he was come near, he beheld the city, and wept over it,
42 Saying, If thou hadst known, even thou, at least in this thy day, the things which belong unto thy peace! but now they are hid from thine eyes.
43 For the days shall come upon thee, that thine enemies shall cast a trench about thee, and compass thee round, and keep thee in on every side,
44 And shall lay thee even with the ground, and thy children within thee; and they shall not leave in thee one stone upon another; because thou knewest not the time of thy visitation.
Acts 24:25 And as he reasoned of righteousness, temperance, and judgment to come, Felix trembled, and answered, Go thy way for this time; when I have a convenient season, I will call for thee.
Galatians 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
Ephesians 5:15-16
15 See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
16 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
Life is not a destination; it is a journey!
We must make a conscious effort to “keep” the Sabbath on a weekly basis. Those that ignore God’s command may end up observing “accumulated Sabbaths” in a hospital room! That’s what happened to Israel; the length of the Babylonian Captivity was determined by the extent of their abuse of the sabbatical year.
Leviticus 26:34-35
34 Then shall the land enjoy her sabbaths, as long as it lieth desolate, and ye be in your enemies’ land; even then shall the land rest, and enjoy her sabbaths.
35 As long as it lieth desolate it shall rest; because it did not rest in your sabbaths, when ye dwelt upon it.
Keeping The Sabbath
If God says that a Sabbath is crucial, that it is imperative to renew our relationships, then we must understand how to observe or “keep” the Sabbath. It is to be a “holy” (set apart, different) day compared to the other six days of your week. How do I keep this day “holy”? By using it the way God intended!
Three Things To Include In Your Sabbath:
- Use the day to rest my body.
Psalm 127:2 It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.
This principle is so important that God used Himself for an example when He created the world!
There are more work saving devices than ever before, yet people are working harder and longer than ever before. A survey by Inc. Magazine reported that two-thirds of North Americans would agree with the statement, “I have burned out or I am on the way.”
If you’re burning the candle at both ends, you’re not as bright as you think you are! You can get so many irons in the fire that you put out the fire! Our bodies were not built for non-stop work.
Ecclesiastes 10:15 The labour of the foolish wearieth every one of them, because he knoweth not how to go to the city.
An old Indian proverb says, “You break the bow if it’s always bent.”
You say, “When I relax, I feel guilty.” Jesus relaxed and He never felt guilty about it; and nobody accomplished more than He did. Even God took a day off after creation; who are you?
An unwillingness to take a day off is basically saying, “I’ve got so much work to do, I’m so important, I’m holding up the world.” You can resign as General Manager of the Universe; it’s not going to fall apart! A reluctance to rest is a sign of immaturity; that’s why your kids don’t like to go to bed on time!
But I’ve got to get all of this done! God says, “I don’t care about the deadline; every seventh day, you don’t work!”
Rest will take care of physical fatigue, but it will not take care of emotional fatigue; that’s why God says you need to do other things on the Sabbath besides just resting…
- 2. Use the day to recharge my emotions.
In the French Revolution, they tried to throw out all of the old laws of France, one of which declared Sunday to be a day of rest. The revolutionaries declared that every day would now be a day of work, but within a few months they had to rescind that law and reestablish one day off per week. The health of the French people was collapsing; their idea for more productivity didn’t work!
The stresses of work drain you, and the pace of your workweek keeps you perpetually in a hurry. We need regular doses of inspiration and encouragement to recharge our emotions!
How do we do this?
Include 3 things in your Sabbath:
- 1. Include time for quietness.
Psalm 23:2-3
2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
In our world of noise pollution, quietness, and soul restoration go together. Part of your Sabbath needs to be a quiet time when you get alone with God.
Isaiah 30:15 For thus saith the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and ye would not.
Psalm 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Many people use the whole weekend to relax and have recreation, but they never have any quiet time. Then they can’t figure out why they’re still stressed out when they go back to work on Monday!
Mark 6:31 And he said unto them, Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while: for there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure so much as to eat.
If you don’t come apart, you’ll come apart!
- 2. Include time for family.
Ecclesiastes 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
Proverbs 17:22 A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.
Proverbs 14:30 A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.
Do you want to live a long time? Then CHILL OUT! Relax and enjoy your family. You’re not wasting time; God says it’s important time.
Half of North American fathers say they don’t spend enough time with their children. The average parent spends only 17 hours a week with their children, leaving them to be brought up by daycares, schools, or television producers. Half of our children watch more than two hours of television a day, but three-quarters of them say that if they could choose between spending time with their families and watching television, they would choose family time. In the US, substitute care for children is growing 33% faster than the US child population! But God says that family time is not optional!
The fallout of this kind of neglect is well documented. Increased drug and alcohol abuse, crime, promiscuous sexual behavior, depression, and suicide among young people are directly correlated to the condition of their families. A Sabbath day for worship and family time is almost a sure protection against many of these problems.
- 3. Include time for fellowship.
Hebrews 10:25 Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.
Psalm 122:1 I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the house of the Lord.
Why did David look forward to the house of God? Because there’s rejuvenation that comes by getting together with other believers! We need each other!
Proverbs 11:25 The liberal soul shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.
In the New Testament, Christians did many things together (the word occurs 31 times in Acts, along with other phrases like “in one accord”). The relationships they forged helped sustain them even through persecution.
Patch Adams, a revolutionary health care provider, subject of a hit movie, and founder of the Gesundheit! Institute, says “Laughter is not the best medicine; friendship is the best medicine.” Almost all the literature of the last 100 years deals with alienation and loneliness. People need to renew their relationships on a regular basis!
- 3. Use the day to refocus my spirit.
The most important part of keeping the Sabbath is worship, the act of tuning out the world temporarily so we can tune in to God.
Psalm 95:6 O come, let us worship and bow down: let us kneel before the Lord our maker
Worship brings into focus the most important things of life.
The tragedy is that many people, on their day off, take the day off! They use the Sabbath to take care of their physical and emotional needs, but they ignore their most important need. Their spirit is empty and in desperate need of being filled with God’s presence.
Mark 8:36-37
36 For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
37 Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?
God wants you to stop every seven days and ask yourself the question, “What am I giving my life to? Where are my priorities?”
Worship is the first thing you need to do on your day off; it is by far the most important. Parents, you need to faithfully model this to your children, even when you are on vacation. You don’t teach values to your kids, you model them.
In his book “It’s About Time” Leslie Flynn has a piece entitled, “IF YOU ARE 35, YOU HAVE 500 DAYS TO LIVE.” His premise is that, when you subtract the time spent on sleeping, working, tending to personal matters, hygiene, odd chores, medical matters, eating, traveling, and other time-stealers, in the next 35 years you will have the equivalent of only 500 days to spend as you wish.
Psalm 90:12 So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.
Novelist Anna Quindlen, in her Commencement Address at Villanova University, had some profound things to say about life:
I’m a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is all I know. Don’t ever confuse the two, your life and your work. The second is only part of the first. Don’t ever forget what a friend once wrote Senator Paul Tsongas when the senator decided not to run for re-election because he’d been diagnosed with cancer: “No man ever said on his deathbed I wish I had spent more time in the office.” Don’t ever forget the words my father sent me on a postcard last year: “If you win the rat race, you’re still a rat.” Or what John Lennon wrote before he was gunned down in the driveway of the Dakota: “Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.” You walk out of here today with only one thing that no one else has. There will be hundreds of people out there with your same degree; there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you will be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk, or your life on a bus, or in a car, or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank account, but your soul. People don’t talk about the soul very much anymore. It’s so much easier to write a resume than to craft a spirit. But a resume is a cold comfort on a winter night, or when you’re sad, or broke, or lonely, or when you’ve gotten back the test results and they’re not so good. So here’s what I wanted to tell you today: get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger paycheck, the larger house. Learn to love the journey, not the destination. Life is not a dress rehearsal; today is the only guarantee you get.
The Sabbath asks the question: Is my work or my worship the most important thing in my life? The lifestyle Jesus taught is not a difficult lifestyle, it is the most logical lifestyle. God knows how you are made!
John 10:10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
One of the clearest signs that your priorities are out of order is that you are chronically fatigued, both physically and emotionally. If your life is like that, the Bible tells you what to do…
Matthew 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Renew your relationships; especially the one with God!
