Lesson 4: The 5th Commandment

Honoring Thy Father and Mother

WE HAVE WORKED THROUGH THE FIRST 4… vertical

1. No other Gods 2. No graven images 3. Honor his name 4. Sabbath

Now the 1st of the Horizontal… 1 verse (very succinct)

Exodus 20:12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

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At first view… it may make God look like a tyrant. (NOT SO) He is Fair

—->> He communicates right up front, that there are consequences to family behavior!
— HOW WE TREAT OUR FAMILY WILL IMPACT OUR WALK WITH GOD!

Ephesians 6:1-4 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

WE HAD A COMMANDMENT WITH JUDGEMENT, BUT NOW WE HAVE ONE WITH A PROMISE… —– long life! —-

THIS ACKNOWLEDGES A BASE PRINCIPLE OF HUMAN LIFE…
( each generation begins were the last one left off )

W/O QUESTION: THE ACTIONS OF OUR PARENTS HAVE AN IMPACT ON US!
( genetically, physically, sociologically, psychologically, & spiritually )

LET’S EXPLAIN THE O.T. COMMANDMENT, THEN HOW IT APPLIES TO THE N.T.

IN O.T.: CHILDREN WE CONSIDERED PROPERTY (they could sacrifice them )
Japthah’s daughter & Abraham’s son ==== How could they get away with that?

P O I N T : –> Jesus changed the status of children in the N.T.!

Luke 17:1-2 Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe [unto him], through whom they come! It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.

PAUL REISSUED THE COMMAND IN THE N.T. WITH A CHRISTIAN FORM = Eph 6 above

Matthew 19:13-14 Then were there brought unto him little children, that he should put [his] hands on them, and pray: and the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.

REMEMBER WHEN JESUS STAYED BACK AT THE TEMPLE?

Luke 2:41 Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the passover.

Luke 2:42-52 And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem after the custom of the feast. And when they had fulfilled the days, as they returned, the child Jesus tarried behind in Jerusalem; and Joseph and his mother knew not [of it]. But they, supposing him to have been in the company, went a day’s journey; and they sought him among [their] kinsfolk and acquaintance. And when they found him not, they turned back again to Jerusalem, seeking him. And it came to pass, that after three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions. And all that heard him were astonished at his understanding and answers. And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing. And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business? And they understood not the saying which he spake unto them. And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR YOUNG, AND MOM & DAD ARE WRONG… YOU WAIT

Hebrews 5:7-9 Who in the days of his flesh, when he had offered up prayers and supplications with strong crying and tears unto him that was able to save him from death, and was heard in that he feared; Though he were a Son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered; And being made perfect, he became the author of eternal salvation unto all them that obey him; ———->>> YOU MUST LEARN TO OBEY BEFORE ORDERING OTHERS! discipline to authority (you don’t always have to understand it

HUMAN NATURE COMES OUT IN CHILDREN: Kids are self centered
Parents role is to teach kids: Things don’t always go the way you want them to… and if you’re too stubborn, you will get hurt!

THIS ASSUMES OF COURSE THAT PARENTS HAVE LEARNED FROM EXPERIENCE!

EX: “I want you home by 11:00… but I’m not a kid anymore.”
“I know, that’s why I want you home by 11:00 !

FRIEND, YOUR STUBBORNNESS WILL NOT BREAK THE LAW OF GRAVITY, it breaks you!
Fire always burns… and some roads lead to hell… SO TEACH THEM RIGHT!
(kids want to rebel… find out themselves… SO DISCIPLINE IS NEEDED!)

Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

——> OBEDIENCE IS RIGHT! — DID NOT SAY TO OBEY ONLY IF PARENTS WERE RIGHT?
…. but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

(NURTURE) = “Tutelage by disciplinary action” (ADMONITION) = mild rebuke

Modern Gurus teach: “don’t punish a child or thwart their personhood”
THAT IS IDIOTIC PSYCHOBABBLE!
—> The devil wants an undisciplined Generation to work with! <—

***** AFTER a child is taught properly, you BACK UP your instruction by making the wrong path more painful! — JUST LIKE ADULTS LEARN! ALL THIS OPERATES ON LOVE & RESPECT FOR ONE ANOTHER!

Ephesians 5:21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

Jesus Christ should be the head of the house!
WITH EACH SUBMITTING TO EACH WITH A SACRIFICING PATTERN OF LOVE!

Only in a setting of mutual submission will these principles work!

Parents submit to Jesus – children submit to Jesus by submitting to parents

—- AUTHORITY WORKS IN 1 PIECE: IF YOUR BRAKE IT, IT FAILS DOWN THE LINE
—>>> Want your children to submit? — then you do it!

MOM AND DAD: ( kids have a divide and conquer concept )
BACK EACH OTHER UP! – ( you JUST wait till your dad gets home” —- WHY WAIT? )

Ephesians 5:20-25 Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

GOLLY DAY I GET WEARY OF THIS… (MEN) TREAT YOUR WIVES AND CHILDREN RIGHT!

Ephesians 5:28-30 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

5:32-33 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife [see] that she reverence [her] husband.

I Peter 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with [them] according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

HUSBANDS & FATHERS: DON’T PUSH YOUR FAMILY TO RESENTMENT BY OVER KILL CORRECTION! – (an overloaded shot gun will explode in your face!)

— provoke not your children to wrath… Mom and Dad = walk worthy! —
Earn your children’s respect by consistent, level headed behavior!

IF YOU WON’T CONTROL ANGER & TEMPER, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO ASK YOUR KID TO

———–> after discipline… give some direction!

HIGH SCHOOL SURVEY: 369 BOYS & 415 GIRLS
( what’s the most desirable qualities in a dad? )

RESULTS: –> 1. respecting kids wishes & stop nagging 2. making lots of money 3. being well dressed 4. have a nice car

NOW DO YOU SEE THE NEED FOR STRONG PARENTAL GUIDANCE?

Young People: All your life you will be faced with obedience!
I don’t like all the laws of our gov’t – but I try to obey (like taxes)

WE ALL DO WHAT WE LIKE — BUT IT IS DOING WHAT WE HAVE TO DO THAT IS THE TEST OF CHARACTER!

What happens if you don’t learn obedience? Later you get married…
MARRIAGE REQUIRES = SELF CONTROL, DISCIPLINE, CONSIDERATION
2 undisciplined people always will end in divorce!

Won’t obey in the home, won’t obey in the city, and won’t obey in the church!

3 MAJOR CONCEPTS KIDS LEARN FROM PARENTS: Concept of: the WORLD of GOD of SELF

over strict, unbending, harsh CAN DISTORT A VIEW as bad as no correction
CHILDREN NEED LOVE AND AFFIRMATION TOO

A MOTHER AND FATHER IS THE FIRST SKYLIGHT WHICH A CHILD FIRST SEES GOD!

Whenever you see over conscientious parents… “look for emotional wreckage to follow”
PARENTS ARE TO DISCIPLINE – BUT NOT DESTROY

Univ. of Chicago asked Grad Students: “where did you get your major ideas of morals & religion?”
Most Common Answer: “FROM FAMILIES MEALTIME CONVERSATIONS”

bottom line:

Exodus 20:12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

THE NEXT GENERATION WILL EITHER CURSE US OR THANK US!

Proverbs 31:27-28 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband [also], and he praiseth her.

Church: Honor your folks while you can!