How To Survive A Betrayal

 

“And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.”

Matthew 24:10

Introduction

 

Being born and raised in an apostolic environment, I was taught the simple basic principles of loving one another in the Lord.  Common respect and courtesy for our fellow man are attributes that are often present even before receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost.  I have always tried with my best human effort, to make friends, and if possible lifetime friends.  This task is sometimes easy and sometimes hard to do; and even though I may not become friends with everyone I meet, I still strive to treat each person in a friendly Christ-like manner.  For this reason, I have never understood BETRAYAL, especially from a brother or sister in the Lord.  It is, of course, not a Godly attribute, but I will admit to personally being betrayed in my lifetime.  Betrayal is a horrible reality that has caused many friendships, marriages, and churches to become broken and unstable.  No one wants to lose friends, but unfortunately that is the common result that betrayal brings. My hope and desire is that this never happens in Fountain View Pentecostal Church.  But we must not be shocked if it does.  I would like to teach this simple bible study about BETRAYAL to each saint, to make us aware and watchful during these last days.

BETRAYAL is Bad

 

Betrayal by anybody is bad.  It is usually mischievous, but when a friend betrays you, it is even more painful and potentially more damaging.  It not only damages relationships but destroys the very fibers of life.  We all live our lives believing to have no betrayals and to be deserted by none of our friends or loved ones.  This would be wonderful, but that would be a world with no Satan or demonic powers at work.

BETRAYAL’S PURPOSE

 

Betrayal is almost always purposed.  It comes with attack and is devised with purposed hurt in mind.  I suppose this is why it really does feel so bad.  To think a trust confidant is now spreading your secrets or a covenant friend is now scheming against you is actually unbearable for many.  Yes, even for Apostolic saints.

This verse below reveals the real heart intent of a master betrayer.

 

“Then one of the twelve, called Judas Iscariot, went unto the chief priests, And said unto them, What will ye give me, and I will deliver him unto you? And they covenanted with him for thirty pieces of silver. And from that time he sought opportunity to betray him.”

Matt 26:14-16

Notice that he actually sought opportunity to betray Jesus.  I personally don’t believe that money was the real cause for Judas betraying Jesus.  At least it wasn’t the initial reason.  However I have heard of people betraying one another over money or for personal gain.

A trusting person is always vulnerable, and the more transparent, the easier to set up.  The more you lean upon other, the more susceptible you are to being let down.  And yet we must still trust our friends and have someone to confide in.  It is healthy to have a close friend or relative to confide in, but it you must remember if they don’t have the Holy Ghost there is more of a chance of betrayal.

Here is another set of scriptures to study and meditate upon…………

“False witnesses did rise up; they laid to my charge things that I knew not. They rewarded me evil for good to the spoiling of my soul. But as for me, when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth: I humbled my soul with fasting; and my prayer returned into mine own bosom. I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother. But in mine adversity they rejoiced, and gathered themselves together: yea, the abjects gathered themselves together against me, and I knew it not; they did tear me, and ceased not:  With hypocritical mockers in feasts, they gnashed upon me with their teeth. Lord, how long wilt thou look on? rescue my soul from their destructions, my darling from the lions.”

Psalms 35:11-17

I have always been one for digging into the Word, so I believe that these scriptures deserve a deeper look.  Let’s pull a couple of phrases out of this passage of scripture and dissect them.

“False witness did rise up; they laid to my charge things that I knew not..”

Notice the false witnesses charged him with things he knew not.  He didn’t even know what he was charged with or what they were saying about him.  He seemed to have no idea that they were doing this, for they were doing this behind his back.  Remember this saint of God, a betrayer is also a deceiver, many times a coward, and most definitely a gossiper.  A good counterpart to this bible study would be my lesson on “The Spirit of A Talebearer”.  You can get this tape from the Tape Ministry.

“I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother”

One of the biggest reasons that this betrayal almost always seems to catch you off guard is the fact that you were trying to be a friend.  You did not suspect anything was being done against you. This betrayer is acting like you were never friends.  It goes on to say that while you behaved as a friend, they were behaving in ridicule against you.  They were mocking you behind your back.  Look at this next verse…

“But in mine adversity they rejoiced, and gathered themselves together.”

They rejoiced while I was in trouble.  They probably said “So be it.” And things like, “He deserves it.” “Well he is reaping what he sowed.”  Or maybe, “I just hope he gets all that’s really coming to him.”

NOTE:  NEVER FEEL GUILTY ABOUT BEING BETRAYED IF YOU DID NOTHING         WRONG. YOU ARE THE VICTIM. YOU ARE THE ONE BEING DESERTED. DO NOT CONDEMN YOURSELF FOR THIS!

THE ABJECTS – “The abjects gathered themselves together against me, and I knew it  not; they did tear me, and ceased not”

Check this out.  The bible calls them abjects.  The definition for the word abject is one of the lowest degree, some one who is wretched, lacking self-respect, and degraded.  The Hebrew word is nekeh (nay-keh’), meaning a smiter or traducer.  A traducer is one who says untrue or malicious things about another to defame and slander them.  They betray through this vicious means and devise hurt for another.  This is very cruel and antichrist.

WHO’S BETRAYING WHO?

 

Take a look at these verses of scripture………..

“ All that hate me whisper together against me: against me do they devise my hurt. An evil disease, say they, cleaveth fast unto him: and now that he lieth he shall rise up no more. Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up his heel against me.”

Psalms 41:7-9

Did you miss it? Who’s betraying who?  Look again….

“An evil disease, say they, cleaveth fast unto him:”…WOW!! Why is that the parent must be wrong if a child runs away from home.  Or, why is it always the teachers lack of skills why a child won’t behave and learn in the classroom.  Or for that matter, why is it that Pastors are charged with a plague when people leave the church.

I always think of the story of a mom and her little boy.  He wasn’t yet waist-high when he asked mama one day, “Mama, why are you such a bad mama?”  The mom said, “Son I am not a bad mama. Why would you say such a thing?”  The little boy looked in her eyes and said, “Mama, you are bad and everyone knows it.  You must be bad”  The mother said to her son,  “Now son, Mama is not bad. I am here to tuck you in every night, and here in the mornings to make you breakfast.  I am working hard on the job to buy you things and to take you places.  Mama is not bad.  Why would you say this?”  The little answered her by saying, “Mama if your are not bad, then why did Daddy leave us?”  The Mom answered with, “Son, Mama is not bad, it is Daddy who has done bad.  He left us.  He is gone, not Mama.  He has a girlfriend that he loves more than me and he does little to nothing for you.  He doesn’t even send us the money that he is supposed to that is meant to help by you things.  Mama is not bad, Son.  It was Daddy who left.  I am here.  He is gone. I stayed with you.  He betrayed us.”

Let’s keep straight who is the betrayer.

·        When someone leaves a marriage, it doesn’t mean the person left behind has a plague.

·        When a business partner leaves another partner, it doesn’t mean that the person who stayed has issues.

·        When people leave the church, it doesn’t always mean the pastor who stayed with the flock has big problems with his ministry.

Prepare yourself, because it is almost always the case that the people departing accuse people who stay of having some disease or plague, just like the verses above revealed.

Ps 55:12-15

12 For it was not an enemy that reproached me; then I could have borne it: neither was it he that hated me that did magnify himself against me; then I would have hid myself from him:

13 But it was thou, a man mine equal, my guide, and mine acquaintance.

14 We took sweet counsel together, and walked unto the house of God in company.

15 Let death seize upon them, and let them go down quick into hell: for wickedness is in their dwellings, and among them.

This passage of scripture pretty much sums it all up.  You see this kind of betrayal is worldwide and age old.  It is not anything new, and you are not the only one who has gone through this.  If your enemies reproach you, it doesn’t shock you or even hurt you inside because you expect this kind of activity and violation from your enemy.  But when a friend betrays you and uses you it isn’t easy to handle.  Always be careful how you deal with those who turn against you.  This is both for your protection as well as your posture.  You want to be sure that your  actions toward them are biblical and not emotional.  Never allow anyone to cause you to disobey the Holy Ghost, or the Word of God.  Deal with matters of life with discretion and God’s anointing.  I trust this study will help those dealing or who may have to deal with betrayal.