Putting People First - 10 attributes of a Leader

What attributes qualify us for leadership? Here is a few suggestions on how these qualities might be put to use.

------

1. Integrity – Where integrity is at stake, the leader works publicly. Behavior is the only score that’s kept. Lose integrity, and a leader will find himself in a directionless organization going nowhere.

2. Vulnerability – Vulnerable leaders trust in the abilities of other people and allow those who follow them to do their best. An invulnerable leader can be only as good as his own performance.

3. Discernment – This attribute lies somewhere between wisdom and judgement. Leaders are required to see many things (pain, beauty, anxiety, loneliness, and heartbreak). Two elements to keep your eye on: the detection of nuance and the perception of changing realities. What kind of antennae do you have?

4. Empathy – Without understanding the cares, yearnings, and struggles of the human spirit, how could anyone presume to lead a group of people? Person skills always precede professional skills.

5. Courage – When conflict must be resolved, when justice must be defined and carried out, when promises need to be kept, when the organization needs to hear who counts – these are the times when leaders act with ruthless honesty and live up to their covenant with the people they lead.

6. Humor – A compassionate sense of humor requires a broad perspective on the human condition and an accounting for many points of view. You’ll find a sense of humor essential to living with ambiguity.

A Few Good Things To Know About People

• Showing your compassionate and caring nature will aid you in forging successful relationships. 

• When you extinguish hope, you create desperation.

• Remember that your followers generally want to believe that what they do is their own idea and, more importantly, that it genuinely makes a difference.

• If you practice dictatorial leadership, you prepare yourself to be dictated to.

• Delegate responsibility and authority by empowering people to act on their own.

• When you make it to the top, turn and reach down for the person behind you.

• You must be consistently fair and decent in both the business and personal side of life.

• Never add the weight of your character to a charge against a person without knowing it to be true.

• Never crush a man out, thereby making him and his friends permanent enemies of your organization.

Communicating With A Secular Audience

A crucial issue for today’s church is communication. At the heart of the Christian faith is the message of the Good News of Jesus Christ. Yet today this message is one of a multitude of messages people are bombarded with daily. Furthermore, the “audience” has changed drastically. Today, the church faces the increasingly difficult task of communicating sacred meaning to a secular audience.

Here’s a check list of things to consider when it comes to evaluating what you’re communicating today as the church amid the rising tide of secularism:

1. Keep it simple. Simplify everything from the bulletin to the sermons. You will communicate better with secular people.
   
2. Translate please. Secular people don’t understand the theological jargon we use. You can simplify Biblical terms without sacrificing their integrity.
   
3. Timing is everything. Time is the new currency. Communication must be concise. If people lose focus because of time, they lose the message.
   
4. Take nothing for granted. The average churchgoer often takes for granted the things new people may not understand. The answer? Define what terms mean.
   
5. Define non- negotiables. Some language and practices simply can’t be changed. Define the non-negotiables and then clarify their meaning.

How To Gain Loyalty

Some of the things you can do in your own congregation to rectify any lack of loyalty are:

1. Teach the difference between faithfulness and loyalty.

2. Remind your people that, according to their new nature, they already want to be loyal. Unless they are outright rebels, disloyal acts come out of ignorance and/or weakness of the flesh.

3. Let them know, in light of their sharpened understanding, you are expecting them to be loyal. They will be what you expect them to be.

Some ABC’s of Modern Ministry

What are people, especially younger generations, looking for?

Authenticity, Not Hype – In all things, the church should strive to be genuine – to be real.

Balance, Not Burnout – For a world running on empty, where teenagers use Day-Timers, the church should be a place of balance.

Connections & Community – A place to belong.

Disciples, Not Decisions – Recognize the different stages of faith development. (Making a one-time decision for Christ is not enough. Christianity is a lifetime walk not a one-time decision. Once the decision has been made, training for growth must begin. How many “saved” are still in the church growing six months or more down the road?)

Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

Here are some simple ways to keep the little things from taking over your life:

1. Ask yourself the question, “Will this matter a year from now?” Is what you are worked up over going to matter a year from now? If not, don’t let it destroy you today.
   
2. Practice Humility. The less compelled you are to try to prove yourself to others, the easier it is to feel peace inside.
   
3. Remember that you become what you practice the most. How do you spend your time? What you do is what you become.
   
4. Every day, tell at least one person something you like, admire, or appreciate about them. Telling others that you appreciate them takes almost no effort, but pays enormous dividends.
   
5. Choose your battles wisely. Every circumstance or problem is not worth the fight. There will always be things and people that don’t do right.
   
6. Life is a test. It is only a test. When you look at life as a test, you begin to see each issue as an opportunity to grow.
   
7. Remind yourself that when you die, your “In Basket” won’t be empty. The purpose of life isn’t necessarily to get it all done, but to do the right things.

Living on the Edge of Disaster.

Are you about to crash and burn because your personal life doesn't measure up to the expectations of the ministry? Here are three warning signals to watch for.

1. Anger. Anger usually results when we feel that we have lost control of a situation or circumstance. Many times we instinctively know that some area of our lives is out of control. That is when we become less tolerant of those around us.
Outward bursts of wrath are easy to detect. Another expression of anger is harder to recognize, but it needs to be viewed as a "red flag" of a troubled heart: sarcasm.

Anger turned inward often comes out in the form of sarcasm. This form of anger is veiled in humor and it may seem harmless, but it has a detectable "edge" to it. It subtly fires darts of hidden criticism.

In Ephesians 4:26-27 we read, "Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil" (NKJV). This scripture is not giving us a license to entertain the emotion of anger. Rather, it is saying that we must deal with this damaging emotion before the day ends. If we don't, we will give place to Satan.

2. The Elijah Syndrome. A second symptom of spiritual bankruptcy is what I call the "Elijah Syndrome". We first see it demonstrated in the life of Elijah himself. The syndrome is displayed in the infamous church service described in I Kings 18:21-40.

But in I Kings 19:9, we see that in not time at all, Elijah went from basking in the blinding light of God's glory to cowering in the corner of a dark cave. He became imprisoned by despair. When we are facing any kind of difficulty, one of the most effective lies Satan feeds us is that no one can understand what we are going through. "No one else has it as bad as I do," we think.

As a result, we begin to cut ourselves off from those who can offer us wise counsel. We are then left to our own distorted reasonings and perceptions.

Don't Interrupt!

Most people react badly to being interrupted. They often feel disrespected and small when you talk over them. People who tend to interrupt others generally do so for one of these reasons:

• They don't place enough value on what the other person has to say. 
  
• They want to impress others by showing how smart or intuitive they are. 
  
• They're too excited by the conversation to let the other person finish talking.

If you are in the habit of interrupting other people, examine your motives and determine to make a change.

A Husband's Responsibilities - For Men Only

I. He is to love his wife as Christ loved the church.

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband" (Ephesians 5:25-33).

• This is total self-giving love. He can only love his wife to the degree that he receives the love of God. Through this kind of love, he brings a sanctification and cleansing for his wife.

II. He is to be tenderhearted toward his wife.

"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:32).

"Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye" (Colossians 3:12- 13).

• The one major complaint women give about their husbands is that they are not tenderhearted (sensitive to their feelings). "He just can't show his emotions."

III. He is to be the provider for the family.

"But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel" (I Timothy 5:8).

"For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat" (I Thessalonians 3:10).

• God works through the husband and father to provide for the wife and the children. This provision should also include protection from physical or emotional harm.