Formula for overcoming failure

Recognize

What is failure? Is it permanent? Is there a second chance? Complete the sentence by circling the right phrase “a person is a failure when…”

1. He makes a mistake;
2. He quits;
3. Someone thinks he is.

Review - Failure should be a teacher, not an undertaker. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end street. A winner is big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them and strong enough to correct them.

Repress - Perhaps your own personal problems and hang-ups caused the failure. If so, begin to work immediately on self-discipline. If you were the problem, put yourself under control. Lord Nelson, England’s famous naval hero, suffered from seasickness throughout his entire life. Yet the man who had destroyed Napoleon’s fleet did not let illness interfere with his career.

Be A Man!

"A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just" (Proverbs 13:22). 

"Behold, the third time I am ready to come to you; and I will not be burdensome to you: for I seek not yours, but you: for the children ought not to lay up for the parents, but the parents for the children" (II Corinthians 12:14).

"Be a Man!" When we were boys, my brother Rick would say this to me after he slugged me and made cry. Brothers can be the best of friends and they can also be very cruel to one another. Rick was 6 years older than I was and without a father in our home at the time, he was the only male role-model in our home and at times, quite the bully.

Be a man. Wow! What volumes of pain and suffering in this world would be avoided if the husbands, fathers and leaders of our world would truly be men. To be a man, has been my personal quest since I was very young. I wasn't quite sure as a boy, what a man was, but something in my heart and mind told me that to be a man was something honorable and good. 

Coming from a dysfunctional family, my understanding of the role of a man has been blurred to say the least. Looking back at my childhood, I realize that the example of a good man was never shown to me. In my early years of being a father, I realized this when I began feeling and expressing a father's love to my children. It was then that I realized that I had never truly been the benefactor of such caring, protective love. Painful memories flooded my mind often as I would compare the careful love my children received from my wife and I, with the careless and even abusive treatment my bothers, sisters and I received at the hands of our parents.

It was at this point in my life, that I realized I was more a true man than anyone in my family had ever modeled before me. No parent, grandparent, or uncle had shown me what it was to be a man. Their own dysfunctional upbringings had so marred their lives that they were incapable of it. I also realized that I had a Heavenly Father who had been and was my example....

The Dark Side of Spiritual Abuse -- Part 2

To give a little history as to how some of the heavy-handed authoritative traits came into play among pastors you have to trace back to the charismatic movement. Out of the charismatic movement there was the evolving of a concept called “shepherding.” 

The Latter Rain movement actually had its earliest beginnings in the late 1800’s and was born out of the Methodist and Holiness camp-meeting environment. It would continue to generate momentum and experience growth during the post-World War II years and be much encouraged by the Charismatic movement in the 1960’s and 1970’s. Marked by extreme excess and abuse of the gifts of the Spirit, this activity led to the production of “prophets” who had little use for personal holiness and consecration. After a while it appeared that they only had a desire for their own personal kingdoms to grow.

As time went by these intruders became susceptible to moral and ethical failures. The subsequent fallout from their failures caused many who followed them to be led astray by their repulsive actions. In an effort to recover from these shenanigans a group of leaders came together and formed what was called “The Shepherding Movement.” Bob Mumford, Derek Prince, Charles Simpson, and Don Basham were the primary founders of this loosely formed organization who determined that its sole purpose would be to form a system of personal accountability. Later a fifth leader, Ern Baxter would be added to make up what was referred to as the “Fort Lauderdale Five.”

They decided that their work would be modeled after the pattern of Paul mentoring his sons in the faith, Timothy and Titus. They would work toward building a system of accountability that would form deeper relationships among pastors, ministry development at all levels, and ethical standards with emphasis on moral and financial dealings.

The whole system worked with the idea that anyone who came into the church needed a“shepherd.” After witnessing the moral collapse of several prominent men, this seemed to be a good and necessary thing. Who could object to the need for spiritual leadership and accountability? It became very heavy on authority and control in a manner that even simple decisions of daily living had to be monitored and approved by the pastor/leader of local congregations.

As an example, the leader would have to make the final decisions on car purchases, home mortgages, and job opportunities. In some cases, the “shepherd” would designate who young men and young women would marry to the degree that the marriages were arranged and carried through. The “shepherd” would have almost complete control over the personal finances. The parishioners would bring their paychecks to him and he would cash them and take his cut which was oftentimes more than 10% and give them the remainder. So as you can see the role of the pastor changed into an extreme form of authoritative control.

Some of the characteristics of the Shepherding system are as follow:

• Discipleship only takes place when one is committed to the group, cell ministry, and its leader.

• The only hope of salvation is extreme devotion to the shepherd of the group. This indicates the leader has more power to save than does Jesus Christ.

• Jesus Christ does not work directly in the life of the follower but rather He works through a system of delegated authority that flows down from the shepherd. You are to submit to this man as you would submit to God.

• Our relationship with God is not primary but rather it works in tandem with the power of a shepherd who has total control over the present, material world we live in.

• Our obedience

How important are relationships anyway?

How important are relationships anyway? I don’t know about you, but in my life, one of the things that has caused me the most pain, is relationships with other people. The relationship between myself and my parents when I was growing up was a most excruciating experience. I nearly took my own life as an adolescent because of the painful experience of relationships in our home. My brothers and sisters beat up on me and literally tortured my brother and I at times.

I have to admit, my understanding of proper relationships or relationship skills was pretty messed up for almost half of my life. For that matter, even for the last 20 years of ministering to others, I have to admit, I have suffered painfully at the hands of relationships with people. People I have trusted have stolen from me and lied on me. People I have loved, have hated me. People I have helped have turned on me. I don’t know about you, but relationships with other people, have really hurt me.

On the other hand, my relationships with some other people have been my salvation. Had it not been for a relationship with a friend in High School, I may have never been introduced to Christ. My relationship with my Pastor helped mold my character as a young man. My relationship with other ministers has solidified my faith and walk with God. My relationship with other Christians, has renewed my faith in people and allowed me to experience a proper relationship experience. In fact many of the brothers and sisters in the church are closer to me than my own siblings. My relationship with my wife has given me something to work towards every day. My relationship with my children is my passion.

Relationships. A good relationship can make you, but a bad relationship can destroy you. The chance we take to have a good relationship is almost not worth the risk to many people. They have been so hurt by relationships that they choose rather to become introvert and avoid relationships with other people at all costs. Their way of avoiding another painful experience is to avoid all close relationships.

How To C.R.A.F.T. A Message

C – collect & categorize

• Eccl. 12:9 (NLT) Because the Teacher was wise … He collected proverbs and classified them …
  
• Collect Bible verses, quotes, articles, books, sermon tapes, illustrations, etc. – even years in advance!
  
• Categorize them in a filing system – put something away each day

R – research & reflect

• Eccl. 12: 9 (NASB) The Preacher … pondered and searched out …
  
• Research is studying with my mind; reflection is listening with my heart (meditation).

A – apply & arrange

• Eccl. 12:11 (NLT) A wise teacher’s words spur students to action and emphasize important truths.
  
• Each sermon should answer three important questions:

                    o What?
                    o So what?
                    o Now what?

• Arrange your sermon in an outline:

1. Keep it SIMPLE.
   Haddon Robinson: “Television has destroyed linear thinking”

Developing a Growing Church

1. There are specific, reasonable and attainable growth goals that have been developed. A pastor must see, believe it and work for it!

2. There is powerful Bible-based preaching and teaching, anointed singing, vibrant worship, fervent praying, and generous giving.

3. There is consistent visitation and follow-up on visitors.

4. The pastor recognizes and releases the gifts and callings among the congregation. These gifts include the gifts of teachers, helpers, prophecy, exhortation, ruling, etc.

5. The organization, coordination, and emphasis of the basic departments - Sunday School, Youth, Outreach, Music, New Convert Care - is always on soul-winning and discipleship.

Money Matters - A Blessing Or A Curse?

Why is it that so many Christians who are working are not doing well financially?  Unfortunately too many Christians are not equipped with the scriptures and methods required to better manage their money.  God has redeemed man from the curse of the law to give him liberty in all things.  This includes money. 

A person who calls himself a Christian must adhere to the scriptures in order to better prepare himself.  Christians should not worry about money.  They should not fret about their finances.  But they should rely on the blessing of God to provide for them everything they need.

In the Chronicles, the young king Amaziah was entrusted with the army of Judah.  He numbered them and prepared them for battle.  However, with only three hundred thousand men ready for battle, the king felt that he needed more soldiers.  So he contacted with Israel for one hundred thousand more men and paid one hundred talents of silver for their services.

The man of God came to King Amaziah and said that God did not want him to use the soldiers of Israel and if the king did so, God would not be with him.  It was obvious what had to be done, however, the King questioned the man of God. “What then shall I do with the hundred talents of silver that has been paid for the service of Israel’s army.”  The man of God replied, “God is able to give you much more than this!”

God is able…fully capable…ready and willing to give you much more if you will only learn to maintain his economic plan and manage what you have.  You can have the blessings of God on you life by obedience.

Is Your Vision Large Enough

There’s a difference between leadership and management.  Management consists primarily of three things:  analysis, problem solving and planning.  If you go to any management course, you’ll find it revolves around those three things.  But leadership consists of communicating your Vision and Values. 

If you don’t clarify the purposes as the leader, who will?

Here are a few guidelines:

Believe it or not, the bigger your vision, the easier it is to reach.  People are rarely motivated by small visions.  They will follow a big vision easier than a little one.  People need a purpose.  Giving them a grand vision will enable them to connect as some level with that vision.  If your vision is narrow, you may fail to interest some people.  However, if your vision is large, it will leave plenty of room for others to get involved.

Don’t worry about solving the problem before casting the vision.  A good example of visionary leadership would be the United States President, John F. Kennedy.  Regardless of what you think about his politics, Kennedy stood up one day in the early 1960’s and said, “We will put a man on the moon by the end of the decade.”  He was clear; he was precise; and the vision was something people could look to.  Now, here’s the interesting thing – when he said it, the technology to put a man on the moon hadn’t even been developed.  That’s visionary leadership!  Just because you don't have all the pieces of the puzzle just yet, does not mean that you can't share the vision.  Let others come along side you who will bring those pieces to the table.

Your God determines how big your goal is.  So, how big do you think God is?  The issue is not who do you think you are, but who do you think God is?  In your dreams for ministry, don’t limit yourself by saying, “What can I do?”  Instead ask, “What can God do?  What can God do in this place?”  Then, use every single tool and resource that God puts in front of you - no matter what it looks like.  Judging whether or not a resource if "of God" will limit God's ability to bless you in your work for Him.  

The Top 10 Steps That Will Help Get You Unstuck

It’s not unusual to feel stuck, trapped, and unable to move from a situation you feel is stifling. Actually, it’s part of life and growth. But, getting “stuck in” and “growing through” situations are different. Here are ten ways to shift from one to the other:

1. Step back and ask yourself what’s really going on. When you’re caught up in the stuff of everyday life, it’s easy to lose objectivity. It’s good to set aside a little time each day to challenge the obviousness of what seems to be going on. Is there a lesson to be learned that you are missing? Might that setback really be a step forward? Will things really turn out as badly as you think they will?
   
2. Consider whether what’s happening has happened before. Is this a unique situation or is it just another example, in different garb, of an issue you’ve failed to confront before? If it’s the latter, maybe now’s the time to solve it and move on.
   
3. Assume that present events and circumstances may be less of a “problem” than parts of a larger “process.” There’s a fair case to be made for the notion that, in this life, all is process rather than result. In other words, what this life is really about is growth and learning. Viewed in this light, where you’re heading is not as important as how you choose to get there. (For those who are strongly goal-oriented, this may be tough to swallow.)
   
4. Ask yourself what you can do next. It’s the small steps that lead to successful journeys. Don’t get sucked in by the suggestion that you’ve got to solve it all today.
   
5. Do something – anything! When you’re stuck, taking any step puts you in a different place and helps change your perspective, even if it’s a wrong move! And, doing something could be a conscious decision to do absolutely nothing!