Ten Principles for Getting Along With Difficult People

It’s easy to love those who love us and those who are easy to get along with. But how do you treat the stranger, the difficult person, that person you don’t really understand, can’t relate to and don’t really care about? Jesus said that is the true test of our character and love.

1. Maintain your confidence by being in right relationship with God. You can’t be objective or discerning if you’re not in good standing with God. A strong relationship with God gives you the grace and confidence to deal properly with difficult people.
2. Remember over- reacting will only accentuate the conflict and confuse the issue.....

Pat Yourself On The Back

Pat yourself on the back. Have you been feeling underappreciated lately?  Does it seem that no one understands how hard you work or how much you are trying?  The feeling that no one appreciates you can be very discouraging to most people. 

We all know the power of congratulations.  Rewarding people with our praise is one of the easiest and most powerful ways to motivate others.  Simple words of encouragement can literally change a person’s life when given at the right moment.  Saying “Good Job” or “This Looks Great” can motivate a person to want to try harder next time in order to please you, as well as give them a much needed sense of accomplishment for the hard work they have invested. What happens though, when no one gives “You” that needed praise?  Who encourages the encourager?  Who tells the guy at the top “Good Job”?  Oftentimes, nobody does this.  Even a self-motivated person has a point where they just need to hear someone say “I appreciate what you are doing.”  So what do you do when those affirmations are few and far between?....

10 Qualities Of A Potential Leader

1. Positiveness: The ability to work with and see people and situations in a positive way.
2. Servanthood: The willingness to submit, play team ball and follow the leader.
3. Growth Potential: A hunger for personal growth and development; the ability to keep growing as the job expands.
4. Follow-Through: The determination to get the job done completely and with consistency.
5. Loyalty: The willingness to always put the leader and the organization above personal desires.

12 Fatal Church Leadership Errors

The 1st Fatal Error:  No Clearly Defined Mission or Purpose

If people do not know and can’t offer a simple explanation to the questions, “Why do we exist, and what are we here to do?” they will not pour themselves into your lack of purpose indefinitely.

The 2^nd Fatal Error: The Wrong Organizational Structure

God designed every land dwelling creature over 7 inches in length to have a skeletal structure to overcome the downward pull of gravity. However the structure must always fit the purpose of the creature. You cannot do the work of the Church with an antiquated structure designed by yesterday’s business world. The Church is physical and spiritual, and its structure must fit God’s designed purpose. 

The 3^rd Fatal Error: Using a Shotgun to Hit a Distant Target

If you place a target 150 yards away and shoot at it with a shotgun then hitting the target becomes accidental. If you want to intentionally hit the target every time use a rifle with a scope. Your vision and supporting actions must be focused and intentional.

The 4^th Fatal Error: Containment

The best way to kill a church is to keep it contained in the four walls. Don’t let the message out. Don’t advertise. Don’t give to outside ministries. Stay away from media markets for telecasting services. Keep the people submitted and never release their ministries. Death will eventually come to such a church, but very few people will ever even hear about it....

100 Pounds Of Myrrh

"And after this Joseph of Arimathaea, being a disciple of Jesus, but secretly for fear of the Jews, besought Pilate that he might take away the body of Jesus: and Pilate gave him leave. He came therefore, and took the body of Jesus.

And there came also Nicodemus, which at the first came to Jesus by night, and brought a mixture of myrrh and aloes, about an hundred pound weight.

Then took they the body of Jesus, and wound it in linen clothes with the spices, as the manner of the Jews is to bury." (John 19:38- 40 KJV)

Upon His death, Nicodemus came to Jesus’ tomb and he and Joseph of Arimathaea, wound the body of Jesus with linen clothes and 100 pounds of myrrh and aloes. This amount of burial myrrh and aloes would have been an extreme amount even for a wealthy person. The usual custom was to use 20 pounds.

Think of this with me. If any of you have ever bailed hay on a farm, you know that a bail of hay weighs around 60-70 pounds. This bail being compacted and compressed into some sort of shape by a bailer. In Jesus’ day, there were no such machine. They would have had to carry this in a sack of sorts. Imagine the scene of Joseph carrying the roughly 175 pound body of Jesus and Nicodemus carrying the huge sack with 100 pounds of myrrh and aloes for the burial.

Putting myself into this text, I find two men who loved Jesus. Enough that they would risk their own life to see that the Lord would receive the very best burial they could give. So, Joseph donates his very expensive tomb and Nicodemos, not wanting anyone to smell the decomposing body of Jesus, brings 100 pounds of costly burial aloes. When people walked by the tomb, he wanted them to only notice the beautiful smell of the myrrh and not the rotting flesh of a dead God....

Wrongfully Accused, Again

Has it ever happened to you? It happened to me again today. Someone said I said something that I didn’t. They did it to defend themselves and their lifestyle of sin. I guess they figured if they could make me look small, it would somehow make them bigger, or at least more righteous.

Several years ago, I realized that people will (dog) the Pastor or the church in order to make themselves appear better than the church. This way, when someone comes to invite them to church, they can use this as a way of saying, “your Pastor is no better than I am. Why should I come to your church?!” And boy if you did say what they said you said. Or if you did what they said you did, now they have every reason in the world to never come to church. As if by some miracle, you were as wise as Solomon and did everything perfectly.

I believe Jesus understood this. Mary and Martha would have blamed Him for their brother’s sickness and death, but the fact of the matter was it was their own lack of faith that allowed their brother to die. And for their lack of faith, Jesus wept. Adam himself wanted to blame his wife for his own sin. As much as Eve did play some part in tempting Adam, the real one at fault was no one else but Adam....

When Brethren Disagree

How do you handle disagreements among brethren? The following article appeared in Brother T.F. Tenney’s book, “Advice to Pastors and Other Saints.” It gives excellent advice concerning how to get along.

• Keep the disagreement in perspective. Don’t reject the person because he or she has a different opinion. A variety of opinions are the spices of life.
• Do not transfer the disagreement to other areas.....

Leaders Love Growth

Only those leaders who act boldly in times of crisis and change are willingly followed.  (Jim Kouzes)

Within the church, God has placed men and women who love to see growth.  It is what keeps us to our tasks.  The lack of increase can kill the joy of our calling so we lean forward looking for any type of progress we can possibly measure.

Growth however, requires change.  Going from where we are presently to a place of increase requires seeing what most people are not able or willing to see.  Seeing change before it happens is called a vision.  Few people are capable of a vision as most would rather stay in a climate that is comfortable.  Comfort however can cause one to never imagine anything better.  A Pastor or congregation who is comfortable with an attendance of 90 will never see a crowd of 300 because they are not desperate enough to make the kinds of changes it would take to gather that kind of increase.......

Momentum Through Raising Up Leadership

As leaders, we have all been guilty of getting excited and all fired up to start a new project.  In our excitement, we call our leadership teams together, plan it all out and set it in motion, without first answering all of the questions that need to be answered.  This is great for creating momentum, but before you begin, ask yourself and your team of leaders if you will be able to sustain everything that you start.

·     If you don't have the right people in place to make it happen, it may be that you need to refrain from starting until you have the right people trained to take on the new project.....