The Dark Side of Spiritual Abuse - Part 5

What I increasingly discovered was in these dark spiritually abusive environments, it serves as excellent and fertile conditions for hypocrisy to prevail. As you dig deeper into these environments you soon discover dark, deviant sins and moral corruption simmering beneath the surface. I believe that the huge level of repression that takes place in these “churches” does nothing except bring out the worst sins of the flesh. Although when someone finally does decide to speak up concerning the matter of these dark sins, the leader usually resorts to efforts of damage control so that the leadership and the church do not have a soiling of “reputation.” Man hasn’t really learned any new tricks about covering sin; he still resorts to insufficient fig leaves just as Adam and Eve did at the beginning of the state of man.

What I also found to be very surprising is that most of the time the wife of the leader will also work toward damage control. She will do everything within her power to live up to the social pressures of maintaining some semblance of normalcy in the various relationships she has within the church. She apparently has come to understand that the dark side of her mate can shift on her as much as it does with those people he is taking advantage of. So instead of dealing with the moral and spiritual failure that is present things are left to follow the course of gravity. Gravity leads the person to maintain an environment of manipulation and absolute mind control on those people he is supposed to serve.

While I have written about the traits and characteristics of those who are involved in a spiritually abusive environment, I have not been specific with practices of spiritual abuse. I will list some of the practices while leaving some of the most extreme situations out as some would probably be absolutely shocked to know this kind of thing takes place under the guise of religion. So here are some actual practices of spiritual abuse:

• A member having to submit financial records to the church leader and the leader determines how and when they are to spend their money.

• A member having to sell various things on a constant basis to feed the coffers of the church so that it entirely benefits the leader.

• A wide disparity between the lifestyle of the leader and the members. He lives like a king while the members appear to live at a level of poverty or barely just able to get by.

• The leader using a “word of knowledge” or “word of wisdom” to pick a spouse for those who are in the congregation.

• Members being absolutely forbidden to question the direction the leader takes or question the decisions he is making.

The Chinese Bamboo Tree

When I read of this amazing wonder of life, I can't help but think of the time and effort we invest into our ministries, often without any evidence of growth or life. There have been many times I have personally invested my time, talent and finances into a person or ministry without evidence that it would pay off. There have been times, because of this, that I have given up on a person. Yet, there have also been times after giving up, that I have seen a breakthrough, and that person I worked with finally accepts a bible study. They finally come to church. They receive the Holy Ghost. Those years of hard work and effort finally pay off.

The Bible states;

Gal 6:7-9

7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.

8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.

9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Are You Ready For Your Healing?

Have You Been Praying that God Would Restore Someone's Health...

But with No Answer? 

Many have prayed for healing and felt like their prayers landed on deaf ears. It can be frustrating. It can wear your faith down and have you wondering if God still cares. Rest assured he certainly does care!

Do you feel that you have faith, but for some reason
have never seen miracles?

Everyone knows someone who’s in need of physical, emotional or mental healing. Yet most people who aren’t educated or experienced with the will of God, seem lost and often unsure if their prayers will even be answered. Is there anything you can do to prepare yourself (or someone else) for a healing?

Are You In Way Over Your Head?

I don't want to be so presumptuous as to speak for everyone in ministry, so allow me to speak from my experience;

I often feel overwhelmed and under qualified at that task that God has set before me. I sometimes wonder if I will be able to communicate what I feel so strongly about in a fashion that would cause those who hear me to feel the same passion I feel. I wonder if I can motivate the Church to move in the direction I believe God wants it to move. I feel especially burdened with these thoughts when I am ministering in an outreach setting where the people have not yet heard the Apostolic Message. (with this group, I may have only one chance) No doubt you have felt the same way.

Early in my ministry, I figured this feeling would dissipate over time as my experience grew. But it hasn't. I still feel overwhelmed and under qualified, even more so than before. Yet, now, I have come to understand this is how God wants me to feel. When I lose this feeling, I am on my way down.

What I am describing is not so much a lack of confidence in one's self. I am not describing someone who is fearful or timid of people and pulpit ministry, but rather someone who is humble. God requires humility in every leader. Without humility you will never reach your people. The moment you feel like you have everything in control is the moment you lose control. The message that you just know is going to fill the altars is going to flop. Pride has no place in ministry. Pride will backfire every time. Yet, when you feel like you are in way over your head or when you feel like you don't have the words to say, God will always make up the difference.

The Honor of the Standard Bearer

Eph 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high [places].

The world has always seemed to be a stage for war.  Tales of armed conflict fill written history.  The Korean War had ended shortly before my arrival on planet Earth.  Vietnam dragged on through my college graduation.  American troops have fought and died in Grenada, Somalia, and our current endeavors in Afghanistan and Iraq.  Regardless of the cause, it seems that there will always be conflict. 

As we look back in history, we see one of the most powerful armies that ever walked the globe, The Roman Legions.  In those ancient days there were no radios, satellite cell phones, or laser guided bombs.  Discipline and order ruled the day.  This army conquered the known world using three basic tenants.

1)    Uniformity.  The centurions all wore the same uniform.  They understood that they were part of something bigger than just themselves.  They carried a flag-type standard called a vexillum, which showed what legion they belonged.  Each century (a 100 man detachment) carried their own standard called a signum.  These standards helped the troops to keep in the right positions during battle.

2)    Communication.  A general would relay his commands to the cornice, (Latin for ‘horn-blower).  Each command had a unique set of sounds.  The cornice had the duty to blow the exact order from his commander.  Under penalty of death he could not, by pride or mistake, change the order he blew through the horn.

3)     Loyalty.  The Legion carried a portrait of the emperor, the imago, this was to remind the troops they owed their loyalty to him.  “. . . just as we make Rome great, it is Rome that makes us great. Without Rome, we are nothing”.  (quote from Caerleon.Net)

The eventual destruction of Rome occurred when they dropped their qualifications for membership in their army.  Where Roman citizenship had been a requirement, outsiders, or barbarians, were allowed in as paid mercenaries.  Discipline and uniformity were dropped in favor of attracting large numbers.  Communication broke down due to language barriers and lack of formal training.  The commands blown through the horn were not understood.  Additionally there was no loyalty to Caesar or Roman culture or values.

The Little Foxes

Pastor Philip Harrelson has contributed a fantastic sermon series titled, “The Little Foxes" to www.PreachIt.org.

We all have spiritual vineyards that we are to be the steward over.  The first vineyard that Rev. Harrelson mentions is that of the soul.  We also have the vineyard of our family and the church.  These are vineyards that we have been chosen to watch over and maintain.  However, there are little foxes that are working to destroy our vineyards.

In this encouraging and instructive series, Rev. Harrelson goes into detail and explains how to efficiently “improve the soil of these vineyards.”  He describes how we need to meditate on God’s Word every day and pray throughout the week as just a couple of the ways to “water” our vineyards. 

Every Pastor, ministry team member and saint of God would greatly benefit to read these messages and apply these life lessons.  This is a series that needs to be taught to every church and every team member. 

Here is the first paragraph of the first lesson in this series: 

Every person has a vineyard.  We may not perceive that we are keepers of vineyards but there are responsibilities that we all have for our vineyards.  First, we have the personal vineyard of our own soul.  It is perhaps the most important vineyard of all that we are to take the most care of.  Our soul is the most valuable possession that we have according to the Word of the Lord (Matthew 16:26; 10:28; Ecclesiastes 12:7).  The care of the soul is a very tedious and challenging process.  It involves the careful work of plowing, planting, cultivating, weeding, watering, and harvesting.  Just as a farmer is in a joint venture with God, to care for our soul will have to be a joint venture with God.  We cannot do it all alone!  We must have God to intervene with Spirit and Word to accomplish His will for us.  

Check up From the Neck up

Five truths of attitudes:

Truth #1:  Our attitude determines how we approach life.

Are you someone who sees the glass half full or half empty?  Do you even see the glass?  The attitude we have whenever we wake up in the morning will usually dictate how the rest of our day will be. 

The story is told of the grandpa and grandma who visited their grandchildren.  Each afternoon, grandpa would lie down for a nap.  One day, as a practical joke, the kids decided to put Limburger cheese in his moustache.  Quite soon he awoke sniffing.  "Why, this room stinks," he exclaimed as he got up and went out into the kitchen.  He wasn't there long until he decided that the kitchen smelled too, so he walked outdoors for a breath of fresh air.  Much to the grandpa's surprise, the open air brought no relief, and he proclaimed, "The whole world stinks!"  How true is that in life?  When we carry "Limburger cheese" in our attitudes, the whole world smells bad to us. 

Money Matters - Why A Budget?

A budget is the tool provided in accounting terms that gives us the proper indication of how we stand in our finances.  Too often people refuse to prepare a budget because it seems cumbersome and boring.  A budget can be implemented in most homes but give only 1-2 hours per month.  That is not much time to have a clear indication as to where you stand financially.  Not only will a budget give you a picture of where you stand, it will help you organize your bill paying so you don’t get behind and have to pay late fees, and it will show you the debt you have so you can pay it off systematically. 

A budget is a guide that tells you whether you are going in the right direction so that you can expect to meet your financial goals.  You may have goals and dreams but if you do not set us guidelines for reaching them and you do not measure your progress periodically, you may end up going so far in the wrong direction you can never get out of financial difficulty.

• A budget lets you control your money instead of your money controlling you.
• A budget lets you control your spending habits.
• A budget allows you to save in a systematic manner.
• A budget allows you to meet your goals.
• A budget will tell you if you are living within your means.

We've All Been Shot

"For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;"  (Romans 3:23)

The colonel was trying to get a convoy of trucks out of the battle zone. The trucks had been under siege by the enemy and there had been terrible wounds and deaths that had occurred.  They had to get out of there if they were going to survive.  The colonel went to the lead truck where the driver had been killed and pulled the body out.  Then he turned to a Sergeant and told him to drive the truck out of there.  The sergeant responded that he had been shot and therefore wouldn't be able to drive, to which the colonel replied, "We've all been shot!  Now drive the truck."

When I first heard this story told from the book Black Hawk Down, immediately I thought of the church and what happens there or, for the case of this article, what doesn't happen because we allow ourselves to make excuses. 

We all have a person, or maybe even a few people, in our church that are ready and willing to do whatever it is that we ask of them.  Whether it be cleaning the restrooms, mowing the lawn, greeting everyone that enters the church, teaching home bible studies, teaching Sunday School,  etc., they will do it.  You know who I'm talking about.  They never stop asking you if you have something that they can do.  They are always the first to greet you after service.  They seem like they are always there.  These people are great and wonderful to have in our congregation.  When you ask them to do something you never have to worry about it getting done, because they have a desire to be used for the Kingdom.  However, these people are usually few in number.