Live Personal Mentoring

If you are like most Christian church and business leaders you have already discovered that "quick-fix" leadership solutions simply do not work.

At best they are Band-Aids that only temporarily mask the real problems. Perhaps you also have experienced the frustration experienced after spending precious dollars to attend conference after conference and realizing that the motivation received wore off shortly after returning to the real world at home. Or maybe you are one of the countless leaders who visit the bookstore for the latest catchy title, only to buy another book that never gets finished and simply winds up looking good on the bookshelf behind your desk. Impressive but ineffective.There is a solution to the leadership dilemma. For many pastors the real solution is less costly than hosting an evangelist, or for a business leader to hire a consultant. The real solution is one-on-one live mentoring with a gifted and seasoned professional who is focused on you and your needs.

Dr. Fred Childs is highly solicited by Christian church and business leaders for personal mentoring. He offers invaluable understanding, insights, and solutions to leaders on a wide range of topics.ChurchMentor.net has an inexpensive monthly membership fee that introduces its members to an abundance of relevant leadership materials in written, audio, and video formats. However, now the services being offered are expanding to include live mentoring as well.

When Do We Engage In Conflict?

Matthew 15:18-19; James 4:1-12

There are times when we as Christians are called to arms, as the song goes, “onward Christian solders.” As they said in the Middle Ages, “if the cause is just…”of course most of the causes were not just. But for us, if there is a situation that must be defended, we need to prepare ourselves and be willing to fight for our Lord. Conflicts that are worth fighting for are such as moral and value issues, spiritual warfare, evil desires, or physical attack.

“When Peter came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he was clearly in the wrong.” (Galatians 2:11)

If someone is going to assault you or a family member and all means available to involve the authorities is exhausted, then we fight. I personally do not get into fist fights, but as a youth pastor, I was on a trip where one of my girls was being assaulted and I had to respond to that situation with physical force or the girl would have been raped. There have been numerous times I had to keep bad intentioned people away from my group to protect them and even use physical force. We as leaders must protect the people God entrusts to us. In working in some inner-city areas, I hired security to prevent potential problems with various events. Yes we are to trust in the Lord, but we are also to use commonsense and practical judgment. As Jesus told His disciples to buy a sword, we to need to follow suit. I do not believe we need to literally be buying swords and wearing guns like the old west. But, we do need to protect the people under our care.

A case in point, several years ago I was doing some intervention counseling with a couple. The husband was severally beating his wife. So I put her into a battered women’s shelter. He then came to me very violently, threatened my life if I did not disclose her location. The police were immediately called, but there was nothing they could do. I heard that the husband found her location so I took some elders with me to the women’s shelter to protect the wife. She got scared and left the shelter and went home. The husband was in the process of literally killing her when we showed up; the police were called and we had to wrestle him to the ground. He was a very big man. I had to knock him out in order to subdue him. It was one of those situations that you may never have to deal with, but they do accrue. By the way, it took the police over two hours to show up as we sat on him; life in the inner city of America.

The Dangers of Liberty

John 8:31-36
31 Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;
32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
33 They answered him, We be Abraham's seed, and were never in bondage to any man: how sayest thou, Ye shall be made free?
34 Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.
35 And the servant abideth not in the house for ever: but the Son abideth ever.
36 If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.

Liberty, Liberation: Freedom from physical, political, and spiritual oppression.

• One of the dominant themes of the Old Testament is that Yahweh is the God who liberated the Israelites from their bondage in Egypt. (Passover)
  
• In the New Testament, God is the one who liberates people from bondage to sin through Jesus Christ. (Cross)

Freedom: The ability to be and do what one wants instead of being controlled by another.

• We are able to choose our actions and attitudes, our responses to others and to God.
  
• In another sense, we cannot be and do what we want because we are not independent of others or God.
  
• The Bible constantly affirms that the kind of freedom all persons have is the kind of freedom that slaves have.

Romans 1:1 Paul, a servant of Jesus Christ, called to be an apostle, separated unto the gospel of God,

Jude 1:1 Jude, the servant of Jesus Christ, and brother of James, to them that are sanctified by God the Father, and preserved in Jesus Christ, and called:

Colossians 4:12 Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ, saluteth you, always labouring fervently for you in prayers, that ye may stand perfect and complete in all the will of God.

Deuteronomy 34:5 So Moses the servant of the LORD died there in the land of Moab, according to the word of the LORD.
(Moses = Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, Kings, Chronicles, Psalms)

2 Timothy 2:24 And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient,

2 Peter 1:1 Simon Peter, a servant and an apostle of Jesus Christ, to them that have obtained like precious faith with us through the righteousness of God and our Saviour Jesus Christ:

James 1:1 James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, to the twelve tribes which are scattered abroad, greeting.
(Moses = Chronicles, Nehemiah, Daniel, Hebrews, Revelation)

Slaves on drugs

• Slaves on opiates are oblivious to their carnal situation.
  
• Karl Marx declared that religion is the opiate of the masses.
  
• I believe that Paul taught that opiates are the religion of the masses:
  (Opiates = Ambitions, Hobbies, Obsessions)

How To Lead Critics

Get up before they get up.  If you are lazy and don’t get started on things until the last minute, your critics will have already accomplished an alternative less effective way of doing things.

Do your homework – Study the situation.  Don’t take other peoples word for it.  Research the problem and with God’s help, find the best solution.  

You run the meetings – Never let anyone but you or someone you desire, to run a meeting.  If they take the platform, shut them down.  Don’t let them take over the meeting.  Never walk into a meeting without knowing the direction and result that the meeting will bring.

Know the trouble makers past – Find out what makes that person tick.  Why are they the way they are?  Knowing more about them will enable you to understand why they feel the way they feel about things and enable you to change them.

Share your vision with others before your critic gets the opportunity to share theirs.  These are busy little people and they work hard at spreading their opinions.  Work harder!  Have coffee meetings where you tell others your dreams and vision.  Go to congregants homes unexpectedly (As your critics do.) and open your heart to them.

Be confident.  No one wants a sissy for a Pastor. (Sorry if that sounds demeaning, but I’ve seen some.)  Don’t be bullied.  Be strong.  Know your calling.  Walk tall.  Square your shoulders.  Lead!  People will follow.   You may lose some critics along the way, (Let them go!) but you will gain a congregation who will follow you into revival.

Momentum - When taking up the offering.

Here are a few things to remember when taking up the offering.

Don’t be timid or embarrassed to ask people for money.   It takes money to make ministry happen.

Teach your people to give financially to the church.  You are robbing them of a tremendous blessing if you are not teaching them to give tithes and offerings.   It is the job of the ministry to instruct people how to give financially to God’s work.

Be the first to give.  Instruct your ushers to take the offering from the platform first.  The Pastor should be the first to give and then anyone who is seated on the platform.  Preachers, musicians, singers, everybody should be instructed to be an example in giving in every service.  Rule number 1 – If you are on the platform, you must give in every offering.  (This serves as an example to the rest of the congregation.  You will be amazed at the increase in offerings when your congregation begins to notice the leadership of the church being the first to give.

Tell the ushers to slow down.  Recently I visited a church where the ushers went so fast collecting the offering that people did not even have time to get their wallets out before the ushers were finished.   Slow them down.  People need time to dig deep.

Pass the plate.  Don’t let the ushers simply walk around with the plate in hand  – only putting it in front of those they feel will give.  Tell them that each person in the congregation should have the plate passed to them.  Let the congregation handle the plate as it passes through every row.

Worship during the giving.  Don’t let the offering be the dead spot of the church service.  Have the musicians play and the singers sing.  The church should worship while they give.

A Pure Heart

Matthew 5: Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

“Pure” as it is used here in the original Greek is katharos. Katharos is pronounced Kath-ar-os. It means of uncertain Affinity; clean (literally or figuratively): clean, clear, pure.

Jesus declared to the people that day that if someone was capable of having, keeping or obtaining a pure heart, that they would see God someday.

It is the desire of every believer that, one day, they would see God.

However, the enemy of our souls has a desire too. His desire is to keep us from seeing God. Both in this world and in the next. His attempt is to cause us to lose our pure hearts.

One thing that I have found to be universal amongst new converts/believers is the pure heart that the Lord gives to them.

As newborn babes in Christ, their hearts are open to receive anything that the church has to offer them. They trust the ministry and they trust their newfound church family.

Their hearts are pure. Their motives are pure. Their intensions are pure. They are simply thankful to be saved and are happy and content to be a part of the Family of God.

These people are the source of revival in the church. They are usually the ones who bring new people to the church. They tell all their family and friends about what the Lord has done for them. They are not afraid or ashamed to declare their Love for God or what He has done for them.

What makes these people so important to a community’s infiltration of the Gospel?

What makes these people so valuable to the growth and continuance of a church in a given city?

Their pure heart.

• A heart that is pure is capable of loving someone who is unlovable.
• A heart that is pure is able to look beyond a person’s faults and see their potential greatness.
• A heart that is pure has no selfish motives. It only wants to bless those around it.

It labors for the Lord because it loves the Lord and the people who surround their life.

This person is not perfect. They are still human. They still make mistakes. They still sin. But Jesus said that because their motives were correct and their heart was pure, that they shall see God.

So it seems paramount that a believer in Jesus Christ should seek to have and maintain a pure heart.

Jesus said in Matthew 11:29, “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest for your souls.”

Mentoring Christian Leaders

Mentoring Christian Leaders

Leadership is a complex issue in the 21^st Century. The Christian leader faces constant challenges whether at home, at work, or in the church. An increasing number of Christian leaders, business owners, and pastors are turning to mentors and coaches for development and assistance . . . and they are wise to do so. The advantages are many.

The word “mentor” is derived from the original Mentor in Homer’s epic poem The Odyssey. When Odysseus, King of Ithaca went to fight in the Trojan War, he entrusted the care of his kingdom to Mentor. Mentor served as the teacher and overseer of Odysseus’ son, Telemachus.

Definition

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines a mentor as "a trusted counselor or guide." A common definition of a mentor is "a wise, loyal advisor or coach."

Application

A mentor is an individual with special gifts or knowledge that helps and guides another individual’s development. Mentoring is used in many settings. One of the most valuable assets your ministry can have is a good mentor.

Why?

Christian leaders are besieged with challenges. Who then do they turn to for counsel, verification, and guidance? Quite often confidentiality is a problem among peers. A seasoned and professional mentor or coach is invaluable in helping guide and validate a leader’s choices and decisions.

Many leaders and even pastors do not have a wise or seasoned elder pastor or confidential authority figure to turn to. Quite often finding solace among peers or elected leaders has proven disappointing.

Many have spent fortunes attending conferences and seminars that seldom have long-term results and lasting impact. Most simply offer motivation that quickly fades away as reality rears it head again.

I Hate Being Head Beagle!

One Snoopy cartoon depicts the famous beagle of Charley Brown lying on the roof of his dog house and complaining that everyone is constantly demanding something from him.  He has so much more to do that he can possibly get accomplished.  In the final frame of the cartoon, Snoopy sighs, “I hate being head beagle!”

Being head beagle is not always as glamorous as it appears to be.  Amazingly, people struggle to become the top dog.  There is some kind of allure to the top position in any given profession and the ministry is no different.  An intoxication to be the one at the top of the ladder oftentimes blurs the true calling and divine purpose of too many people.

Few however, know the true cost of being the one with the title before his/her name.  At the same time, those who are the One at the Top, overestimate their own true value.  Any organization that only thrives because of the charisma of its sole leader is in trouble.   In the day that the person whom the whole organization is revolving around falls away or steps aside, that organization is going to struggle to find direction for its immediate and future direction.  Few churches/organizations who follow this pattern can survive completely with the loss of their fearless leader.

Why Some Churches Grow And Others Decline

In a recent study of church growth, the following factors and strategies were noticed as being utilized in growing churches while churches that were declining were not using these principles.

1. Reach out to Newcomers. Focusing on the needs and concerns of newcomers, making inquiry convenient and non-threatening, and allowing people to move at their own pace, characterized the growing churches.

2. Build Member Commitment. While reaching newcomers is most important, the growing churches expected much of members, and active involvement of everyone was sought.

3. Train and Involve Laity. There was always a bold, compelling vision for the congregation’s future as well as ways of equipping and deploying laity drawn to the vision for ministry.

4. Make Bold Plans. Churches with goals and dreams far beyond current ministries and resources were more likely to grow than other churches, all other things being equal.