A Few Good Things To Know About People

• Showing your compassionate and caring nature will aid you in forging successful relationships. 

• When you extinguish hope, you create desperation.

• Remember that your followers generally want to believe that what they do is their own idea and, more importantly, that it genuinely makes a difference.

• If you practice dictatorial leadership, you prepare yourself to be dictated to.

• Delegate responsibility and authority by empowering people to act on their own.

• When you make it to the top, turn and reach down for the person behind you.

• You must be consistently fair and decent in both the business and personal side of life.

• Never add the weight of your character to a charge against a person without knowing it to be true.

• Never crush a man out, thereby making him and his friends permanent enemies of your organization.

Just Don't Quit!

The story goes like this...

The guy wakes up on Sunday morning and say's, "I'm not going to church today!" "Why not?" The good wife asks. "I just don't feel like it and besides, I'm not sure everyone there likes me. In fact, I'm sure that Sister Jones outright hates me!" The man retorts. "Well you have to go." Responds his wife. "Why's that?" He asks. "Because", she says, "You're the Pastor!"

Ever been there? Don't answer that. I can't find much scripture on this, but I honestly feel a spirit of Defeat attack me at least one day out of the week. This little guy must keep a tight schedule, since he always comes on the exact same day. Hardly ever does he come around on an off day. It's always the same day, Monday!

You may not understand this unless you've Pastored or been in ministry for a while. I've heard other ministers say this Imp who I will call Defeat, attacks them on Mondays too. So I suppose I am not alone on this one.

I'm not much of a quitter. Quitting is just not in me. Sometimes I wonder if I'm too stubborn to quit, or too stupid to realize it's time to quit. Like old Shammah. Defending a field of lintels against a whole troop of Philistines. Just him and an dead donkey's jawbone.

Was that guy tough or just not smart enough to get out of the way? We've preached him tough, but I really worry for the man. He didn't have much to work with there. Why didn't he just fall back (quit) and regroup? You know, get some help. I believe I have the answer...He was neither stubborn or dumb. He knew his purpose!

The Road Rage Phenonmenon!

What makes people act the way they do when they get in a car.

If I bumped into you as we enter an elevator, I would politely say "excuse me" and that would be it. But if my car comes into your lane and "almost" touches yours, Look Out! How many times we read or see where someone was even beaten up or shot over road rage. Testifying before a House transportation subcommittee, National Highway Traffic Safety Administration officials estimated that two-thirds of the 42,000 highway deaths last year were related to aggressive driving, which appears to have joined drunk driving as a perilous trait of American culture.

Otherwise seemingly, quite, reserved people who turn violent when someone cuts them off in traffic. I've done it and so have you. Nothing irritates me more than sitting at a 4 way stop and the person to my right doesn't know it's their turn to go. And so there we sit, waiting for the other person to go first. I wonder if some folks ever did read the driving manual.

I'm sure all of us at one time or another have been rewarded with that certain hand gesture by someone who felt we offended them in traffic. I've even had young girls offer that one now and then. (Maybe I'm just a bad driver.) How could someone give such an offending gesture to someone they don't even know?

Well, that's really what I want to talk about. I only reminded you about your road rage to make a point. The fact is, people experience road rage, because they don't know you. There is nothing personal about driving past someone on the road. Yours is only a very brief encounter. You will never see them again. They can say or do what they want to you and they will never have to face up to it. Your relationship has no value. And as a result, neither do you. Isn't that sad?! (I'll give you a little hint. If you need to get into a lane and no one will let you into it, simply roll the window down and give them a big smile and wave. Now they will let you in.) Try it.

As long as you are only another car on the road, you don't matter. But when you become a face and a person with a smile, well that's another story. They'll stop the traffic in their lane to let you in. I'll admit, I'm a horrible driver. Just ask my wife, she'll tell you. But even she knows that I can cut into any lane of traffic I want, because of a smile and a wave.

I wonder though how many of us have this same mentality even when we get out of our cars. Hmm, let's try a little test here. Let's say you are on vacation and a few hundred miles out, you stop to have dinner at a restaurant. You know, at one of those places where they cook everything in lard. What happens if the service or food is bad? Do you tip her any way? Well you don't have to do you?! After all, she doesn't even know you. Well, you might even be able to get off a couple of "complaints" to her since she won't see you in church this week.

Overwhelmed

I frequently converse with ministers and business leaders who are overwhelmed. They need help and I have solutions. I am good at what I do. However, all too often my attempts to help prove futile because leaders are notorious for not allowing themselves to see beyond assumed responsibilities and circumstances. They have problems focusing. For some it might be their Attention Deficit Disorder kicking in, and for others it is simply personal neglect. Just as a mechanic’s car often needs the most repair, and a plumber’s house needs a leaky faucet fixed, leaders seem to avoid personal changes of routine and lifestyle.

Sadly this is all too common. Many leaders assume roles and responsibilities they should not assume and therefore settle for a constant state of chaos and mediocrity. Numerous potential problems arise when a leader reaches a saturation point but refuses assistance and is unwilling to change habits.

I want to highlight a five of the potential problems and emphasize a few solutions for each.

The first potential problem: Addiction to adrenaline. Workaholics get used to the adrenaline they feel when meeting certain goals or deadlines. Many leaders develop a sense of pride at being busy; often boasting whenever their schedule hits overload because it feeds their false ego of self-importance. They have a hard time saying “no” to new responsibilities.

The intensity one feels when overwhelmed develops stress. This affects the quality of their relationships. Stressed leaders can become very controlling, territorial, moody, and sharp with their reactions to others. Stress also has negative affects on health in the long term.

Depression often sets in when someone who is addicted to adrenaline attempts to slow down or relax. Time with God, loved ones, and for personal development tends to be neglected or placed on the backburner. Those things simply aren’t the leader’s priority, and that is a big part of the problem.

Suggested solutions include:

• Establish a maximum number of hours to focus on work each day.
• Refuse to take work home with you.
• If an extra request for you to do something means you cannot accomplish it without adding to your maximum allotted workday hours then say “no” to the request.
• Schedule time off on a regular basis.

The second potential problem: Burnout. The body, mind and emotions are designed for a balance of work and rest. Time must be made for both. Burnout sneaks up on you, and when it comes it can be very difficult to conquer.

Burnout produces a cacophony of emotions. One might develop a sense of guilt, anger or regret. These are hard to overcome when one is in a state of burnout.

Mentor Somebody

Your life is not measured by your accomplishments, but rather by the people you’ve touched and the lives you changed.

Mentoring someone allows you the opportunity to affirm their ministry and change the direction of their life.

You don’t have to wait for someone to ask you to mentor them.  Pull them aside and explain to them that you see potential in them and you believe they are ready to be mentored.  You may be amazed to find that they have been waiting on SOMEONE to notice them. 

Don’t judge – Critique.  The difference between the two is one is done out of love and concern the other is not.  Let your aspirant know that you care only for their growth and want to offer suggestions for them to become better. 

Open up.  Tell them of your early shortcomings.  Let them know that all is not going to be easy.  Confess a few faults and ways you have conquered them.  There is nothing common to man.  There is a great possibility that they may need to know how to get over a few things along the way.

Model it in front of them.  They are going to do what you do - not what you say.  Regardless of how well you explain things to them, they are going to model themselves after your actions.  You speak to them when you are not speaking to them at all.  Remember they are watching you and learning. 

Meet with them.  Choose definite times to meet together.  Doing this tells them that you care about their growth and are concerned about them as a person.

4 Letters Every Pastor Should Remember

L. I. D. S.

Learn - The very first thing that a pastor or spiritual leader should know is that they must learn from the people around them; whether it be staff members, the congregation, or others.  We can learn valuable things from the children in the church all the way up to the assistant pastor. How well do you understand your people? Are you willing to learn from them? Successful leaders are constantly open to learning.   As leaders, we should always do this before pursuing any goal.  Otherwise,  we will only be hindering progress.  Always be a student.  Paul commanded Timothy in:

2 Timothy 2:15
"Study to shew thyself approved unto God..."

Innovate - Creativity should be promoted and never ignored.  In the Sunday School department, the youth department, church planning meetings, etc., we should encourage those department heads and staff members to be innovative. If their ideas are not what you would do, so what! Their idea may work better than yours. By using the ideas and the creativity of your entire leadership team, you will keep everyone involved and invested in your vision.  Don't be afraid of change.  Remember, one of the first things our God did was create.

Genesis 1:1
"In the beginning God created…"

10 Qualities Of A Potential Leader

1. Positiveness: The ability to work with and see people and situations in a positive way.
2. Servanthood: The willingness to submit, play team ball and follow the leader.
3. Growth Potential: A hunger for personal growth and development; the ability to keep growing as the job expands.
4. Follow-Through: The determination to get the job done completely and with consistency.
5. Loyalty: The willingness to always put the leader and the organization above personal desires.

Connecting With People

If you desire for people to follow you, you have to connect with them.  The catalyst of your relationship with them at any level may very well have to be a result of your constant effort to associate with them. An unbeliever’s only basis for coming into the knowledge of truth may well be his relationship with his teacher/preacher. 

Connect with them on a personal level.  Find out what it is that interests them and try to find a common interest.  Get to know them personally.  Visit their home.  Invite them to yours.  Go places with them.  Let them know you care for them on more than a Pastoral level.  If they consider you to be their friend, they will support you much more than if you are only an authority to them.

Connect with them on a professional level.  If he is a doctor, read a few books on the latest surgery procedures.  If he coaches football, learn a bit about the game.  If she is a teacher, talk education with her. 

Connect with them in your preaching.  Personalize your preaching.  Major newspapers write their articles on the 6th grade educational level.  Hence they are able to reach a broader audience than if they wrote them on the college level where most people may not understand certain wording.  Bring bible stories and situations into present day circumstances.  Touch home once in a while.

Why Some Churches Grow And Others Decline

In a recent study of church growth, the following factors and strategies were noticed as being utilized in growing churches while churches that were declining were not using these principles.

1. Reach out to Newcomers. Focusing on the needs and concerns of newcomers, making inquiry convenient and non-threatening, and allowing people to move at their own pace, characterized the growing churches.

2. Build Member Commitment. While reaching newcomers is most important, the growing churches expected much of members, and active involvement of everyone was sought.

3. Train and Involve Laity. There was always a bold, compelling vision for the congregation’s future as well as ways of equipping and deploying laity drawn to the vision for ministry.

4. Make Bold Plans. Churches with goals and dreams far beyond current ministries and resources were more likely to grow than other churches, all other things being equal.