Steps That Will Get You Unstuck.

It's not unusual to feel stuck, trapped, and unable to move from a situation you feel is stifling. Actually, it's part of life and growth. But getting "stuck in" and "growing through" situations are different. Here are some ways to shift from one to the other.

• Step back and ask yourself what's really going on. When you're caught up in the stuff of everyday life, it's easy to lose objectivity. It's good to set aside a little time each day to challenge the obviousness of what seems to be going on. Is there a lesson to be learned that you are missing? Might that setback really be a step forward? Will things really turn out as badly as you think they will?

• Consider whether what's happening has happened before. Is this a unique situation or is it just another example in different garb, of an issue you've failed to confront before? If it's the latter, maybe now's the time to solve it and move on. 

• Assume that present events and circumstances may be less of a "problem" than parts of a larger "process." There's a fair case to be made for the notion that, in this life, all is process rather than result. In other words, what this life is really about is growth and learning. Viewed in this light, where you're heading is not as important as how you choose to get there.

• Ask yourself what you can do next. It's the small steps that lead to successful journeys. Don't get sucked in by the suggestion that you've got to solve it all today.

The Ideal Mentor Always...

1.  Tells you the truth – even when it hurts. 

One man who has been one of my mentors for almost 18 years especially stands out because of his honesty with me.  Early in my ministry and marriage, he pulled me aside and explained to me that I was not very respectful to my wife in public.  He explained that the ladies of the church would not honor me as a minister for this reason.  At the time I was offended that he would tell me this as I thought I was very good to my wife.  However, years later, I see where he was coming from.  I’m grateful that he was bold enough and honest enough to talk to me about a sensitive subject.  Honoring my wife and publicly showing her affection has not only given me respect among the other ladies of the church, but has also been a blessing to our marriage.

2.  Shows a good example for you to follow.

The old cliché “Do as I say, not as I do.” Does not work in mentoring.  A lifelong mentor should be someone who is a model of who you want to become.  Everyone is a little bit like the people who have parented them.   Part of a mentor’s role is to let the protégé watch them closely in the work that they do.  One of my mentors would often times invite me to sit in on important meetings that I had no experience in.  I would never say a word unless asked my input.  I understood that I was there to observe and to learn.  I watched my mentor closely to see how he handled fragile situations that I had no experience in.  I would often ask myself how I would handle these often sensitive meetings, but would then watch my mentor expertly handle delicate subjects with Godly wisdom.

3.  Sees you as family.

Mentoring someone is a life long commitment.  Your best mentors are not people who are only a part of your life for a short amount of time.  A mentor sees you as a son or daughter in the Gospel.  Paul who mentored Timothy referred to him as his son.  Anything less than a family level commitment may prove to be a surface only relationship between mentor and protégé.  Often times, subjects discussed in a mentoring relationship are sensitive and personal.  A protégé needs to know that he is going to someone who is a father figure who only has the protégé’s best interest in mind. 

4.  Shows himself/herself to be open and transparent with you.

A good mentor is someone who is not afraid to talk to those they mentor about their failures as well as their successes.  My father would often say to me, “Don’t make the same mistakes that I have made.”  This is a good reason for mentors to be open with their protégés.  You may save that person a tremendous amount of pain and numerous mistakes by revealing to them the mistakes you yourself have made along the way.

25 Questions To Ask Before Making Major Decisions

Not every question in this list will help you in every situation. This is simply a check list to help you keep from overlooking important considerations before confirming and carrying out major decisions.

1. At it's essence - in one sentence - what is the decision I'm really facing? What is the bottom, bottom line?
2. Am I dealing with a cause or a symptom? A means or an end?
3. Am I thinking about this situation with a clear head or am I fatigued to the point that I shouldn't be making any major decisions.
4. What would the ideal solution be in this situation?
5. Should I seek outside counsel in making this decision?
6. What are the hidden agendas that are pushing for a decision in this situation? Why do we or they want a change? What is the source of the emotional fuel that is driving this decision?
   
7. If I had to decide in the next two minutes - what decision would I make and why?
8. What decision would I expect each of my three most respected advisors to favor in this situation?

Money Matters - Stewardship Is Critical

God provides for us so that we might in turn protect what he has given us.  Our God entrusts us to live within our financial means and ability.  To live outside this ability, jeopardized the provisions of the family. 

God owns everything but he gives us the use of it all.  As we can be further trusted, he entrusts us with more.  We become the managers of his blessings and provisions.  If we cann't be trusted with what we have, how do we expect God to trust us with more?  The management and care of God’s provisions is critical to future blessings.

According to Matthew 25:15-27, God expects dividends and a return on his investment.  If we do not properly care for it and squander it, then we can expect to be cut off from the continued blessings of God.  Luke gave us a clear indication of this in Luke 16:10 as he stated that the person who is faithful in little things is an indicator of faithfulness in larger things.

While earthly things are temporal, we still have to live here on earth.  God gives us everything we need to live, survive, and enjoy the fullness of life.  We must care for it with all diligence.

Why People Give To Nonprofit Organizations

The following are the results of a poll given by the Barna Research Group.  It may shed some light as to why people give.  Remember people give their time and talents for similar reasons they give their money to the church or other organizations.

They have a great reputation for being reliable and trustworthy.

Accuracy of this description.  (continue for each question)

Very                 Somewhat        Not too            Not at all

66%                 27%                 2%                   4%

You feel good about yourself when you know that you have helped others.

59%                 31%                 5%                   6%

The organization is involved in a type of work that is of greatest interest to you.

54%                 35%                 4%                   4%

You have seen or studied the work of the organization firsthand and know they’re trustworthy.

49%                 36%                 4%                   9%

They Shall Mount Up With Wings

This often-used scripture has always challenged the believer, for most want to be able to live up above the earthly arena of life. The one key is written; They that wait, they that serve the Lord with life and lips will surely learn the art of mounting up. I read an article about birds that stated, "The hearts of birds are heavier in proportion than the hearts of man or other animals." The reason given was, the more the body works, the greater the demand on the heart, which causes it to become heavier. Birds are very hard working creatures and so should the believer be.

A lofty life lived on spiritual wings requires an enlarged heart, which means constant fellowship with God Himself. If we are to live in the Heavenlies, to arise we must ask God to give us a bigger heart. Our desires must be for Spiritual things and only a heart after God will allow that.

In Psalm 119:32, the writer shouts, "I will run in the way of thy commandments, when thou shall enlarge my heart!"

Why Do People Leave The Church?

Knowing some answers to this question can not only keep a church from losing some great people, but will also bring a church into revival as the back door is closed to a large degree.

It’s kind of like money.  It’s not how much you make, it’s how much you save.  Some count their new converts by the hundreds, but few of these converts are still in the church a year later. 

People leave the church because of boring sermons.  Some people can tell when a preacher is shooting from the hip or preaching to the choir.  “Study to show yourself approved.”   You are not going to keep some people unless your messages are getting into their heart and mind.   They have come to hear a Word from God.  Get one from the Lord for yourself and then give it to the congregation.

People leave the church because they feel the ministry does not care about them.  Greet them, shake their hands, phone them, write them a letter, smile at them, visit them when they are sick, send them a card when you can’t.  Let them know you care.  One kind word spoken at the right moment in a person’s life can cause them to be devoted to you for the rest of their life.

People leave the church because they have no relationships there.  Develop ways for new converts to develop relationships within the church.  Small Groups are a great place for new people to gain those necessary relationships.

Myrrh For A Dead God?

"And after this Joseph of Arimathaea, being a disciple of Jesus, but secretly for fear of the Jews, besought Pilate that he might take away the body of Jesus: and Pilate gave him leave. He came therefore, and took the body of Jesus.

And there came also Nicodemus, which at the first came to Jesus by night, and brought a mixture of myrrh and aloes, about an hundred pound weight.

Then took they the body of Jesus, and wound it in linen clothes with the spices, as the manner of the Jews is to bury." (John 19:38- 40 KJV)

Upon His death, Nicodemus came to Jesus’ tomb and he and Joseph of Arimathaea, wound the body of Jesus with linen clothes and 100 pounds of myrrh and aloes. This amount of burial myrrh and aloes would have been an extreme even for a wealthy person. The usual custom was to use 20 pounds.

Think of this with me. If any of you have ever baled hay on a farm, you know that a bale of hay weighs around 60-70 pounds. This bale being compacted and compressed into some sort of shape by a baler. In Jesus’ day, there were no such machine. They would have had to carry this in a sack of sorts. Imagine the scene of Joseph carrying the roughly 175 pound body of Jesus and Nicodemus carrying the huge sack with 100 pounds of myrrh and aloes for the burial.

Putting myself into this text, I find two men who loved Jesus. Enough, that they would risk their own life to see that the Lord would receive they very best burial they could give. So, Joseph donates his very expensive tomb and Nicodemos, not wanting anyone to smell the decomposing body of Jesus, brings 100 pounds of costly burial aloes. When people walked by the tomb, he wanted them to only notice the beautiful smell of the myrrh and not the rotting flesh of a dead God.

I’m not sure where these two were doctrinally at this point, but I do know that they heard the truth preached to them by the Lord himself. However, I’m not so sure they got what Jesus tried to get them all to understand. “(John 2:19 KJV) Jesus answered and said unto them, Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.”

People often quote John 11:35, “Jesus Wept”. Recently at a funeral of 2 friends, the minister referred to the Lord as a mourner who also wept at the funeral of His friend Lazarus. I don’t believe Jesus wept because his friend was dead. He sure was not too concerned when they told him about Lazarus being sick a few days prior. I am certain that the reason Jesus wept at the tomb of his friend is because of the unbelief of those whom Jesus had spent much time with, trying to convince them that He was the Resurrection. How many funeral processions did Jesus stop to raise the dead? He had proven to all of them that He was able to raise the dead. I believe He went to the tomb of Lazarus hoping to find Mary and Martha sitting in wait, full of faith that regardless of how long it took, Jesus would show up and when He did, He would raise His friend to life again. Jesus did not weep for Lazarus’s death, he wept because of the faithlessness of Mary and Martha. Hear his rebuke to them, (John 11:25 KJV) “Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live:”

It's Called Character

Based on surveys of more than 15,000 people, the following traits were selected as the key to effective leadership:

                                  · Being honest – 87%

                                  · Being forward-looking – 71%

                                  · Being inspirational – 68%

                                  · Being competent – 58%

• Honest people have credibility – and that’s what gives leaders the trust and confidence of their people. High credibility leaders foster such things as greater pride in the organization, a stronger spirit of cooperation and teamwork, and more feelings of ownership and personal responsibility. What are some of the other characteristics of credible leaders?
• They do what they say they will do. They keep their promises and follow through on their commitments.
• Their actions are consistent with the wishes of the people they lead. They have a clear idea of what others value and what they can do.