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"A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just" (Proverbs 13:22).
"Behold, the third time I am ready to come to you; and I will not be burdensome to you: for I seek not yours, but you: for the children ought not to lay up for the parents, but the parents for the children" (II Corinthians 12:14).
"Be a Man!" When we were boys, my brother Rick would say this to me after he slugged me and made cry. Brothers can be the best of friends and they can also be very cruel to one another. Rick was 6 years older than I was and without a father in our home at the time, he was the only male role-model in our home and at times, quite the bully.
Be a man. Wow! What volumes of pain and suffering in this world would be avoided if the husbands, fathers and leaders of our world would truly be men. To be a man, has been my personal quest since I was very young. I wasn't quite sure as a boy, what a man was, but something in my heart and mind told me that to be a man was something honorable and good.
Coming from a dysfunctional family, my understanding of the role of a man has been blurred to say the least. Looking back at my childhood, I realize that the example of a good man was never shown to me. In my early years of being a father, I realized this when I began feeling and expressing a father's love to my children. It was then that I realized that I had never truly been the benefactor of such caring, protective love. Painful memories flooded my mind often as I would compare the careful love my children received from my wife and I, with the careless and even abusive treatment my bothers, sisters and I received at the hands of our parents.
It was at this point in my life, that I realized I was more a true man than anyone in my family had ever modeled before me. No parent, grandparent, or uncle had shown me what it was to be a man. Their own dysfunctional upbringings had so marred their lives that they were incapable of it. I also realized that I had a Heavenly Father who had been and was my example.
We hear a lot about mentors these days. I myself have 3 men who are my mentors. I'm not sure they all know it. But, I have patterned my life and ministry after the example they have led in my life. As well, I also mentor more than one young minister. My Heavenly Father is my dearest mentor. As a young father, I would often ask myself, "How would my Heavenly Father react to this situation?" If I asked myself how my earthly father would react or respond to a given situation, I would get a host of harmful or dangerous answers. Yet, when I would ask myself how my Heavenly father would respond, I would get an answer that was helpful and healthy to my children.
I am a student of my heavenly father. I not only want to be a good father by His example, but I also want to be as good a man as he is. Jesus' example to men is by far the best example that anyone could follow. His manhood did not allow him to shirk his responsibility to humanity. It was his maleness that caused him to robe Himself in flesh and suffer for you and I. You might say that it was his Divinity or His God-ness that would cause such an act. I would argue that His maleness was the element of His Divine makeup that caused Him to risk everything to save His children. A true Father would do that. A genuine man would die for his children and His friends. Without hesitation, he would suffer as Jesus suffered for us. If it meant that my children would not have to live with pain and sickness as I have seen in this world, I would suffer the same beating that Christ suffered at the whipping post. Why? Because a real man would do that for His children.
We live in a world that does not understand or appreciate good men. In fact, we elect men of questionable character into public office every year. William Jefferson Clinton was one of the worst embarrassments this proud country ever had to endure. The nations of the world scoffed and ridiculed us for having such a man as our national leader. Yet, we held him high as our President. We gave him the same careful respect that we gave the many other honorable men who have lead this country. And at each turn, he took this country farther and farther away from the virtuous values that our great country was founded upon.
Where are the men? Where are the fellows who would rise up and say, "Follow Me!", and be someone worth following. Where are the great leaders of public office and church who would lead us to righteousness and Truth. Have we come so far in the wrong direction, that there is no way to return to our God given roles as fathers and men? It used to be that men were chosen to public office because of their good character. Now, he is chosen by the personal profit the voter would receive by his being elected. Political campaigns are no longer public endorsements of a man's good character and ability to lead, but now they are advertisements telling voters what they will gain personally if the man is elected. Who cares if the man is of extremely questionable character, as long as taxes go down and gross pay goes up.
I want to be a good man. In my old age, I want to be the honorable Patriarch of my children's children. When they need Godly advice, I pray that my life would be of such example that they would consider my counsel valuable. Proverbs 13:22 is speaking of more than financial wealth. I believe it is speaking of the example a good man would give to his children. I have spent most of my adult life making decisions and choices that are incorrect, because no good example was given to me as a child. My point of reference in life has had no true bearing. My life has not had the advantage of a righteous father's influence.
Admittingly, I have envied the fellows around me whose fathers are Godly men. I wonder how my life might have been different if I could have had such good influence. At the same time, I am so very thankful that my own son could have the influence of a Godly father. He is such a precious soul, and I pray that my example to him would somehow affect my family into the next generation. My prayer is that he would become a better man than myself, so that his influence would touch the lives of my great grandchildren.
"Be A Man." What a high calling. What an honorable place. Many ministries would still be intact if that minister would have been a truly good man. Many families would still be together if that husband would have understood what it meant to "be a man".
"Be A Man, Be A Good Man"
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What makes people act the way they do when they get in a car?
If I bumped into you as we enter an elevator, I would politely say "excuse me" and that would be it. But if my car comes into your lane and "almost" touches yours, Look Out! How many times we read or see where someone was even beaten up or shot over road rage. Testifying before a House transportation subcommittee, National Highway Traffic Safety Administration officials estimated that two-thirds of the 42,000 highway deaths last year were related to aggressive driving, which appears to have joined drunk driving as a perilous trait of American culture.
Otherwise seemingly, quite, reserved people who turn violent when someone cuts them off in traffic. I've done it and so have you. Nothing irritates me more than sitting at a 4 way stop and the person to my right doesn't know it's their turn to go. And so there we sit, waiting for the other person to go first. I wonder if some folks ever did read the driving manual.
I'm sure all of us at one time or another have been rewarded with that certain hand gesture by someone who felt we offended them in traffic. I've even had young girls offer that one now and then. (Maybe I'm just a bad driver.) How could someone give such an offending gesture to someone they don't even know?....
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The Road Rage Phenonmenon!
What makes people act the way they do when they get in a car?
If I bumped into you as we enter an elevator, I would politely say "excuse me" and that would be it. But if my car comes into your lane and "almost" touches yours, Look Out! How many times we read or see where someone was even beaten up or shot over road rage. Testifying before a House transportation subcommittee, National Highway Traffic Safety Administration officials estimated that two-thirds of the 42,000 highway deaths last year were related to aggressive driving, which appears to have joined drunk driving as a perilous trait of American culture.
Otherwise seemingly, quite, reserved people who turn violent when someone cuts them off in traffic. I've done it and so have you. Nothing irritates me more than sitting at a 4 way stop and the person to my right doesn't know it's their turn to go. And so there we sit, waiting for the other person to go first. I wonder if some folks ever did read the driving manual.
I'm sure all of us at one time or another have been rewarded with that certain hand gesture by someone who felt we offended them in traffic. I've even had young girls offer that one now and then. (Maybe I'm just a bad driver.) How could someone give such an offending gesture to someone they don't even know?....
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- Visionary leader - These leaders have a crystal-clear picture of what they want to happen. They cast visions powerfully and possess indefatigable enthusiasm to pursue the mission.
- Directional leader - The directional leader can carefully assess the values, mission, strengths, weaknesses, resources, personnel, and openness to change of an organization - then point that organization in the right direction.....
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There are many different ways to lead God's people. Here are 9 different leadership styles. Which leadership style do you resonate most with?
- Visionary leader - These leaders have a crystal-clear picture of what they want to happen. They cast visions powerfully and possess indefatigable enthusiasm to pursue the mission.
- Directional leader - The directional leader can carefully assess the values, mission, strengths, weaknesses, resources, personnel, and openness to change of an organization - then point that organization in the right direction.....
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Building a Condemnation Free Ministry
One of the saddest occurrences is when I spend time trying to mentor an experienced Christian minister who is wrestling with regrets, guilt and self-condemnation after they have given a lifetime to the work of God.
Christian ministry should be satisfying and rewarding. The joy, peace, fulfillment and contentment should be overflowing for anyone who has devoted their life to arguably the world’s most noble profession. Surprisingly instead of entering a time of bliss and contentment, a vast number of ministers and their spouses enter their later years disillusioned, angry, bitter, depressed and saddened over missed opportunities, mistakes, bad judgments, regrets, and a list of similar discouragements. This simply ought not to be. What about you? Are you living with regret, guilt, or condemnation right now? Is it easier for you to quote Romans 8:1 than it is to live it? “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.” KJV
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Building a Condemnation Free Ministry
One of the saddest occurrences is when I spend time trying to mentor an experienced Christian minister who is wrestling with regrets, guilt and self-condemnation after they have given a lifetime to the work of God.
Christian ministry should be satisfying and rewarding. The joy, peace, fulfillment and contentment should be overflowing for anyone who has devoted their life to arguably the world’s most noble profession. Surprisingly instead of entering a time of bliss and contentment, a vast number of ministers and their spouses enter their later years disillusioned, angry, bitter, depressed and saddened over missed opportunities, mistakes, bad judgments, regrets, and a list of similar discouragements. This simply ought not to be. What about you? Are you living with regret, guilt, or condemnation right now? Is it easier for you to quote Romans 8:1 than it is to live it? “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.” KJV
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Conducting a Spiritual Audit
Twelve questions to keep your personal accounts in order
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- Am I becoming less religious and more spiritual? The difference: I can control religion, while spirituality controls me.
- Does my family recognize the authenticity of my spirituality? If I am growing spiritually, my family will recognize it.
- Do I have a flow-through philosophy? As a Christian I am to let the blessings flow through me to others.
- Do I have a quiet center to my life? There is an important difference between the fast track and the frantic track. Peace is the evidence of God.....
Conducting a Spiritual Audit
Twelve questions to keep your personal accounts in order
- Am I content with who I am becoming? Every day I get one day closer to who I will ultimately be. Am I satisfied with who this will be?
- Am I becoming less religious and more spiritual? The difference: I can control religion, while spirituality controls me.
- Does my family recognize the authenticity of my spirituality? If I am growing spiritually, my family will recognize it.
- Do I have a flow-through philosophy? As a Christian I am to let the blessings flow through me to others.
- Do I have a quiet center to my life? There is an important difference between the fast track and the frantic track. Peace is the evidence of God.....
Perception of the Church in a Social Media Driven World
How people perceive you greatly influences whether or not they will receive what you have to say. In the day that we are living, it is definitely a different world than it was 20 or 30 years ago. With cell phones & computers you can now do everything from make a phone call to do your banking and even have online social interactions. Our world has changed because of these. Along with this, it’s changed how people interact with one another.
As a result, this has changed how we do church to a large degree. Or at least it should. Let’s be honest, we don’t have the personal connections that we used have with people. Its just part of our modern day culture that we are living in. However, that does not mean that we cannot fill the churches we lead with hungry people. In this socially disconnected age that we are living, people are looking for something that is real and genuine....
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Perception of the Church in a Social Media Driven World
How people perceive you greatly influences whether or not they will receive what you have to say. In the day that we are living, it is definitely a different world than it was 20 or 30 years ago. With cell phones & computers you can now do everything from make a phone call to do your banking and even have online social interactions. Our world has changed because of these. Along with this, it’s changed how people interact with one another.
As a result, this has changed how we do church to a large degree. Or at least it should. Let’s be honest, we don’t have the personal connections that we used have with people. Its just part of our modern day culture that we are living in. However, that does not mean that we cannot fill the churches we lead with hungry people. In this socially disconnected age that we are living, people are looking for something that is real and genuine....
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Formula for overcoming failure
Recognize
What is failure? Is it permanent? Is there a second chance? Complete the sentence by circling the right phrase “a person is a failure when…”
- He makes a mistake;
- He quits;
- Someone thinks he is.
Review - Failure should be a teacher, not an undertaker. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end street. A winner is big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them and strong enough to correct them.
Repress - Perhaps your own personal problems and hang-ups caused the failure. If so, begin to work immediately on self-discipline. If you were the problem, put yourself under control. Lord Nelson, England’s famous naval hero, suffered from seasickness throughout his entire life. Yet the man who had destroyed Napoleon’s fleet did not let illness interfere with his career.
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Formula for overcoming failure
Recognize
What is failure? Is it permanent? Is there a second chance? Complete the sentence by circling the right phrase “a person is a failure when…”
- He makes a mistake;
- He quits;
- Someone thinks he is.
Review - Failure should be a teacher, not an undertaker. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end street. A winner is big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them and strong enough to correct them.
Repress - Perhaps your own personal problems and hang-ups caused the failure. If so, begin to work immediately on self-discipline. If you were the problem, put yourself under control. Lord Nelson, England’s famous naval hero, suffered from seasickness throughout his entire life. Yet the man who had destroyed Napoleon’s fleet did not let illness interfere with his career.
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(This is an excellent article for Pastors to share with anyone involved in leadership or ministry in their church.)
Sometimes you just have to say it like it is. This is one of those times. I offer this to you in a gentle spirit and pray that if you share it with others on your team, that you would do so in a spirit of gentleness and meekness.
John Maxwell says “Only do what only you can do.” This is important in the various areas of ministry of the local church. One thing that stops the momentum of a church is various leaders trying to run someone else’s ministry. When God has placed you in an area of ministry within the church, he did not put you there so you could judge other lay ministers of the church. Do your job and let others do theirs.....
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Staying Focused in Your Area of Ministry
(This is an excellent article for Pastors to share with anyone involved in leadership or ministry in their church.)
Sometimes you just have to say it like it is. This is one of those times. I offer this to you in a gentle spirit and pray that if you share it with others on your team, that you would do so in a spirit of gentleness and meekness.
John Maxwell says “Only do what only you can do.” This is important in the various areas of ministry of the local church. One thing that stops the momentum of a church is various leaders trying to run someone else’s ministry. When God has placed you in an area of ministry within the church, he did not put you there so you could judge other lay ministers of the church. Do your job and let others do theirs.....
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How do you influence people? Do you influence them intentionally? Do you influence them in a positive way? Are you even a person of influence? Do people listen when you speak? John Maxwell lists influence as number two on his list of the twenty one laws of leadership. You must have influence with people if you desire to be a leader.
In life and in leadership you will be influenced and you will also influence others. The degree to which you can influence people is the key to success. Influencing people to become great will help you to succeed. There is also a flip side of influence; allowing great people to influence you will help you to influence others. Before you ever become a person of influence, first you must become influenced. Winston Churchill said, "Before you can inspire with emotion, you must be swamped with it yourself. Before you can move their tears, your own must flow. To convince them, you must first yourself believe.".....
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Influencing People
How do you influence people? Do you influence them intentionally? Do you influence them in a positive way? Are you even a person of influence? Do people listen when you speak? John Maxwell lists influence as number two on his list of the twenty one laws of leadership. You must have influence with people if you desire to be a leader.
In life and in leadership you will be influenced and you will also influence others. The degree to which you can influence people is the key to success. Influencing people to become great will help you to succeed. There is also a flip side of influence; allowing great people to influence you will help you to influence others. Before you ever become a person of influence, first you must become influenced. Winston Churchill said, "Before you can inspire with emotion, you must be swamped with it yourself. Before you can move their tears, your own must flow. To convince them, you must first yourself believe.".....
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Developing A Growing Church
Pastor Ray Johnson of the Denham Springs Pentecostal Church shares the characteristics of a growing church.
- There are specific, reasonable and attainable growth goals that have been developed. A pastor must see, believe it and work for it!
- There is powerful Bible-based preaching and teaching, anointed singing, vibrant worship, fervent praying, and generous giving.
- There is consistent visitation and follow-up on visitors.
- The pastor recognizes and releases the gifts and callings among the congregation. These gifts include the gifts of teachers, helpers, prophecy, exhortation, ruling, etc.
- The organization, coordination, and emphasis of the basic departments - Sunday School, Youth, Outreach, Music, New Convert Care - is always on soul-winning and discipleship......
Developing A Growing Church
Pastor Ray Johnson of the Denham Springs Pentecostal Church shares the characteristics of a growing church.
- There are specific, reasonable and attainable growth goals that have been developed. A pastor must see, believe it and work for it!
- There is powerful Bible-based preaching and teaching, anointed singing, vibrant worship, fervent praying, and generous giving.
- There is consistent visitation and follow-up on visitors.
- The pastor recognizes and releases the gifts and callings among the congregation. These gifts include the gifts of teachers, helpers, prophecy, exhortation, ruling, etc.
- The organization, coordination, and emphasis of the basic departments - Sunday School, Youth, Outreach, Music, New Convert Care - is always on soul-winning and discipleship......
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