Pat Yourself On The Back

Pat yourself on the back.

Have you been feeling underappreciated lately?  Does it seem that no one understands how hard you work or how much you are trying?  The feeling that no one appreciates you can be very discouraging to most people. 

We all know the power of congratulations.  Rewarding people with our praise is one of the easiest and most powerful ways to motivate others.  Simple words of encouragement can literally change a person’s life when given at the right moment.  Saying “Good Job” or “This Looks Great” can motivate a person to want to try harder next time in order to please you, as well as give them a much needed sense of accomplishment for the hard work they have invested.

What happens though, when no one gives “You” that needed praise?  Who encourages the encourager?  Who tells the guy at the top “Good Job”?  Oftentimes, nobody does this.  Even a self-motivated person has a point where they just need to hear someone say “I appreciate what you are doing.”  So what do you do when those affirmations are few and far between?

Encourage yourself!  David did it.  1 Samuel 30:6;

And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the LORD his God.

Maybe you’ve never had the congregation ready to stone you, (Or maybe you have…) but there have probably been many times where you wondered where even your closest followers' devotions were.  David understood that this was one day where encouragement from the men was not going to come.  They were tired, discouraged, and let down.  He knew that there was nothing he could do or say that would cause them to appreciate all he was trying to do for them.  The only thing left for David to do was to “Encourage Himself”.  The scriptures say he “…encouraged himself in the Lord his God.”  Wouldn’t it be something if we could know exactly what he said or did to do this.  What were his words?  “Don’t worry David (to himself), God’s got your back.  You’re doing a fantastic thing for the Kingdom of God.  Don’t be discouraged, the Lord knows where you’re at right now.”  These are things we might say to another person to encourage them, so why not say them to ourselves? 

I confess, I talk to myself on occasion.  Not like a lot of people do, but rather to encourage myself.  A few years ago, I began to become very discouraged when it seemed that no one else seemed to appreciate the very hard work and tremendous accomplishment that I was experiencing.  So, I began to do something that might sound a bit strange to many people.  I began “patting myself on the back”.  Seriously, I literally patted myself on the back and said to myself, “Good job Jim.  No one else may notice what you just did, but I did and I think you did a fantastic job.”  I know that sounds odd, but I have to be honest with you, it felt good.  I said it to myself and at the same time realized that the guy saying it knew what he was talking about.  He was someone who recognized when someone did something great and he was now complementing me.  Only, me was also me, so for some that might not sound so great.

However, it was the only praise that was going to come to me that day, so if it had to come from me, I was going to accept it.

Seven Signs of a Growing Church

42 And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers.43 And fear came upon every soul: and many wonders and signs were done by the apostles.44 And all that believed were together, and had all things common;45 And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need.46 And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart,47 Praising God, and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.

1.      A Praying Church.

The first century church  continued in prayer. The fact that it continued means that it had previously started. These people had been praying long before the outpouring of the Holy Ghost in the book of Acts.

Acts 1:14  KJV14 These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication, with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brethren.

Before the church ever experienced growth there was prayer. Corporate and unified prayer. This was the foundation of what happened in Acts chapter two. Prayer is the most basic and necessary requirement of any church. Prayer is the foundation upon which everything else is built. A praying church is a church that is ready and waiting to do whatever God desires to do amongst them.

Don't Interrupt!

Most people react badly to being interrupted. They often feel disrespected and small when you talk over them. People who tend to interrupt others generally do so for one of these reasons:

• They don't place enough value on what the other person has to say. 
  
• They want to impress others by showing how smart or intuitive they are. 
  
• They're too excited by the conversation to let the other person finish talking.

If you are in the habit of interrupting other people, examine your motives and determine to make a change.

Overwhelmed

I frequently converse with ministers and business leaders who are overwhelmed. They need help and I have solutions. I am good at what I do. However, all too often my attempts to help prove futile because leaders are notorious for not allowing themselves to see beyond assumed responsibilities and circumstances. They have problems focusing. For some it might be their Attention Deficit Disorder kicking in, and for others it is simply personal neglect. Just as a mechanic’s car often needs the most repair, and a plumber’s house needs a leaky faucet fixed, leaders seem to avoid personal changes of routine and lifestyle.

Sadly this is all too common. Many leaders assume roles and responsibilities they should not assume and therefore settle for a constant state of chaos and mediocrity. Numerous potential problems arise when a leader reaches a saturation point but refuses assistance and is unwilling to change habits.

I want to highlight a five of the potential problems and emphasize a few solutions for each.

The first potential problem: Addiction to adrenaline. Workaholics get used to the adrenaline they feel when meeting certain goals or deadlines. Many leaders develop a sense of pride at being busy; often boasting whenever their schedule hits overload because it feeds their false ego of self-importance. They have a hard time saying “no” to new responsibilities.

The intensity one feels when overwhelmed develops stress. This affects the quality of their relationships. Stressed leaders can become very controlling, territorial, moody, and sharp with their reactions to others. Stress also has negative affects on health in the long term.

Depression often sets in when someone who is addicted to adrenaline attempts to slow down or relax. Time with God, loved ones, and for personal development tends to be neglected or placed on the backburner. Those things simply aren’t the leader’s priority, and that is a big part of the problem.

Suggested solutions include:

• Establish a maximum number of hours to focus on work each day.
• Refuse to take work home with you.
• If an extra request for you to do something means you cannot accomplish it without adding to your maximum allotted workday hours then say “no” to the request.
• Schedule time off on a regular basis.

The second potential problem: Burnout. The body, mind and emotions are designed for a balance of work and rest. Time must be made for both. Burnout sneaks up on you, and when it comes it can be very difficult to conquer.

Burnout produces a cacophony of emotions. One might develop a sense of guilt, anger or regret. These are hard to overcome when one is in a state of burnout.

Nine Essential Leadership Skills

What basic leadership skills make pastors effective in their ministries? Here are 9 essentials.

1. Leaders do lead. Many people in positions of religious leadership simply don't lead. The fact is that true leaders do lead. They chart a course, garner the necessary support and resources, and work to succeed. 
   
2. Leaders lead from a spiritual center. Men and women engaged in ministry are careful to ask God to help them lead from a spiritual center. Today's spiritual leaders must also take the time they need to quietly seek guidance. 
   
3. Leaders compromise creatively. As soon as a vision is articulated and plans are established, obstacles and roadblocks will occur. They'll seek ways to compromise creatively so that the end goal will still be accomplished. 
   
4. Leaders deal constructively with conflict. Whenever someone provides leadership, conflicts will arise. Effective leaders learn how to deal constructively with conflicts and maneuver around them. 
   
5. Leaders are willing to listen. Strong leaders know that listening to others helps them in two ways. First, by hearing what others say, their own vision for the future can be clarified, modified, and intensified. Second, when leaders listen respectfully, even to criticisms, they not only gain additional insight, but often receive the support of the speaker. When leaders listen, people rally around.

Tips To Effective Preaching

Let’s look at some real examples of effective preaching. Our text will be from Acts 2 where Peter preached on the day of Pentecost, and from Acts 3 where the lame man was healed while they were on their way to the temple. In both of these instances Peter ministered in such a way that thousands were saved. I think we can learn a lot from Peter (Acts 2:14-38 & 3:12-26).

Effective preachers must study. As you look at these two messages from Peter, you will see that he had studied the word. In both instances he was suddenly given the opportunity to preach, and he was “instant in season and out of season” (2 Timothy 4:2). There is no shortcut to “studying to show yourself approved, a workman that needs not be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15).

When I first started preaching I would minister on a different book of the bible every service – and we had three services each week! I used at least seven commentaries on each book. After researching them thoroughly, I would then seek the Lord as to how He wanted me to present the message and what kind of application He wanted for His people.

This took a lot of time and effort, but it was well worth it. It placed ample research under my belt to draw upon later when I wouldn’t have as much time. Taking shortcuts to in depth study will rob you of the rich jewels that the Lord desires to give you from His word and Spirit.

Effective preachers must memorize the Word. There is nothing more powerful than the Word of God. Peter, in his sermon on the day of Pentecost, quoted large and obscure passages of scripture. He didn’t pull out a scroll and start looking things up, he knew them by heart. We have the promise that His word will not return to Him void (Isaiah 55:10-11). It is sharper than any two edged sword (Hebrews 4:12). The word will do more in the hearts of people than I ever can. When I was first saved I made up my mind that I wanted to give people God’s answer to the problems of life and not only what I thought. My opinion is not worth much, but what God has to say is of eternal value.

Nothing has helped me in my preaching and teaching more than the memorization of scripture. Even if people have a hard time taking it all in, it will go on to work in their lives for years to come. Jesus said the Holy Spirit would “bring all things to your remembrance whatsoever he has said unto us” (John 14:26). His promise is that He will bring the appropriate scripture to us when it is needed the most. It was said of Jesus that when He was in a house in Capernaum, and there was so many people crowding into the house that there was no longer any room, that “He preached the word unto them” (Mark 2:2). It’s the word that makes our ministry truly effective as it did Jesus’.

The Work Of The Connector

In his book, The Turning Point, Malcolm Gladwell describes the work of the connector.  The connectors he explains are important to social epidemics.  The reason why a new restaurant would become the new hotspot in the community might well depend a great deal on the work of the connector.  You see, a connector is the person in the market place who tells all their friends about the great deal they just got at Wall Mart.  Or the fantastic food they ate at a new restaurant.  Every church has connectors in them.

I have identified my wife as being a connector.  Should Natalie find a bargain at say Wall Mart, she will immediately call her mother and sister on the phone and them about the great deal and why they should head over to Wall Mart as soon as they get off work.   My wife is a connector.  She loves telling people about everything from the newest restaurant, to the store who has a sale on paper napkins.

My life was changed by a connector.  I was 17 years old when I came into contact with this person.  95% of the relationships I have today are a direct result of this one connector in my life.  Mike was his name.  Had this person never told me about and invited me to his church, I never would have met most of the people who I now know as my close friends and colleagues.  He was not a preacher.  He was a connector.

Something excited him about his church and he could not help himself to share it with someone else.  Mike is not an orator.  He is not a teacher of God’s word.  But he connected me to the people who would eventually change my life. 

We all have had the work of a connector in our lives.  They introduced us to the church.  They introduced us to our spouse.  They told us the kind of car we should buy.  They work behind the scenes to promote projects, products and agendas and they do it every day without pay or recognition.  You might say it’s their personality.  I would say it’s more of an obsession with some people.

My wife can’t help herself.  She has to share her good fortune.  I have told her in the past to keep some bargains to herself.  Like the beautiful new dress she just got off a clearance rack for a few bucks.  I tell her let people think you paid a little something for it, but no, she has to tell the world where they can get the same deal.  She loves to be the connector.

Momentum In Leadership

As a leader, how many times have you enthusiastically started a new project, excited about its prospects?  Eager to begin, you call together your leadership teams, make plans and set the project in motion.  But one thing lacks…you’ve forgotten to answer the questions that need answering. 

Starting new ventures is great for creating momentum in the church; however, before you begin you must ask yourself and your team leaders if the project is sustainable in the long run.  In other words, can you finish what you start?  What’s more, if the right people aren’t in place to make it happen, it is more beneficial to refrain from starting until you have the appropriate people trained to take on the new project. 

The Leadership of Jesus

In everything Jesus is our example, and momentum in leadership is no exception.  Jesus looked ahead.  His death, burial, resurrection and ascension into heaven were just a few short years away. In order for the church to succeed without Him, He trained and positioned the right people in the right place, ready to carry on His ministry after His ascension. 

Often times Jesus said, "My hour is not yet come,” or "It is not yet my time." He walked in sync with God’s will and timing, cognizant of the preparation needed to complete His earthly tasks.  And He made sure His disciples were equipped to continue His ministry after He left this earth. 

The Lord is the finest example of leadership we will ever hope to have.  His calling and training of the twelve disciples is a model of perfect leadership in ministry. Through Jesus’ leadership style, we can gain a sense of what it takes to create momentum in our ministries. The momentum Jesus created with His twelve disciples still moves forward today, 2000 years later. 

Putting People First - 10 attributes of a Leader

What attributes qualify us for leadership? Here is a few suggestions on how these qualities might be put to use.

------

1. Integrity – Where integrity is at stake, the leader works publicly. Behavior is the only score that’s kept. Lose integrity, and a leader will find himself in a directionless organization going nowhere.

2. Vulnerability – Vulnerable leaders trust in the abilities of other people and allow those who follow them to do their best. An invulnerable leader can be only as good as his own performance.

3. Discernment – This attribute lies somewhere between wisdom and judgement. Leaders are required to see many things (pain, beauty, anxiety, loneliness, and heartbreak). Two elements to keep your eye on: the detection of nuance and the perception of changing realities. What kind of antennae do you have?

4. Empathy – Without understanding the cares, yearnings, and struggles of the human spirit, how could anyone presume to lead a group of people? Person skills always precede professional skills.

5. Courage – When conflict must be resolved, when justice must be defined and carried out, when promises need to be kept, when the organization needs to hear who counts – these are the times when leaders act with ruthless honesty and live up to their covenant with the people they lead.

6. Humor – A compassionate sense of humor requires a broad perspective on the human condition and an accounting for many points of view. You’ll find a sense of humor essential to living with ambiguity.