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Dealing With Self-Doubt
By: Rev. D.E. Haymon
"Today I yield the floor to Rev. D.E.Haymon. I came across this wonderful article this week and with his permission would like to share it with you. If you have an article that would be an encouragement to our ministerial audience, please feel free to forward it for consideration. "
“Dealing With Self- Doubt”
We wouldn’t worry nearly so much about what others think of us—if we knew how seldom they did! Our natural social and emotional insecurities sometime make us feel far more vulnerable than we really are. I’m talking about self-consciousness—the feeling that everyone (at least someone) is watching and carefully critiquing every move we make.
Having a clear conscience goes a long way toward giving us self-confidence. When we have nothing to hide, there’s nothing to fear! This Scripture clearly lays it on the line: “The wicked flee when no man pursueth: but the righteous are bold as a lion” (Proverbs 28:1). Someone long ago said, “I’d rather go to bed with a mangy dog than try sleeping with a guilty conscience.” Of course, both the filth and stench of the dog, or the conscience, would equally make sleep impossible.
We may safely assume that many of the complaints made in the Psalms, especially those written by David after his sin with Bathsheba, and having hired the assassination of her innocent husband, reflect abject fear. Even after his confession, David carried the scars of his evil deeds. It is especially touching that, to clear himself, he honestly accepted full responsibility. “Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight,” he said, then added, “That thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest” (Psa. 51:4). Literally, he committed himself to whatever horrible thing God might say or do in judgment for his sin. Oh, that all might exhibit such humility!
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One Snoopy cartoon depicts the famous beagle of Charley Brown lying on the roof of his dog house and complaining that everyone is constantly demanding something from him. He has so much more to do that he can possibly get accomplished. In the final frame of the cartoon, Snoopy sighs, “I hate being head beagle!”
Being head beagle is not always as glamorous as it appears to be. Amazingly, people struggle to become the top dog. There is some kind of allure to the top position in any given profession and the ministry is no different. An intoxication to be the one at the top of the ladder oftentimes blurs the true calling and divine purpose of too many people.
Few however, know the true cost of being the one with the title before his/her name. At the same time, those who are the One at the Top, overestimate their own true value. Any organization that only thrives because of the charisma of its sole leader is in trouble. In the day that the person whom the whole organization is revolving around falls away or steps aside, that organization is going to struggle to find direction for its immediate and future direction. Few churches/organizations who follow this pattern can survive completely with the loss of their fearless leader.[ read more...]
I remember my first romantic heartbreak. I actually recall crying myself to sleep on multiple nights because I was moving away from my girlfriend. I didn’t want to do it, but my parent’s decision to move was above my pay grade and I had no choice in the matter. She was the girl of my dreams and I was head over heels in love but I had no choice but to leave her.
I was only in the second grade when that particular family move seemingly destroyed my romantic life. Although it was difficult I eventually got over it and learned to move on with life. Yes, I am being facetious, but in reality this early event taught me that times of transition are sometimes very difficult for everyone involved.[ read more...]
There are times that I really get wrapped up with being important. I mean those times when I am so into the importance thing that the whole world finds it’s orbit around me. I know that you may find that hard to believe, that “importance” could have such a dizzying effect on me but it does.
In fact some time ago, I found myself being very important. Our church was hosting a preaching workshop. Rick Wyser was doing his very good seminar “The Six Should-Be’s of Preaching” and I was feeling particularly important. We had plotted and planned and had all sorts of free books, gadgets, computer programs and all sorts of other things to give out to the participants. Somewhere around fifty ministers came and we were having a tremendous time. Nothing motivates me like talking about becoming a better preacher, so I was definitely enjoying the element.[ read more...]
I am sure that most of those reading the title will think I have lost it for sure. However, I feel I have found it: While we seem to waste so much energy trying to avoid problems, troubles and things we deem unpleasant, the truth is—Trouble has built within it a blessing for all who will deal with it honestly. Trouble can surely reveal ourselves quite painfully and quickly, to say the least. Trouble has a way of making us reach beyond our small, imposed limitations and really allows for the accomplishment of so much more.
Difficulty is not a dirty word. We are made strong by what we are forced to face, not by what we have managed to side-step and avoid. Trouble has within itself a CHALLENGE we all need, to propel us into a higher level and to tap into our Latent Potential laying dormant. We all have a built-in desire to just coast. To do what has to be done and take life easy. This has never been the Way Of God. He has always managed to put His people into some tough situations, yet He always brings them out—and much better, I might add.
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Children’s activities books often have these little exercises. They will display one picture with many items and characters, and when you turn the page, you see a very similar picture which almost looks identical. To the casual glance you would think that nothing is different about the two pictures. However the small instructions at the top of the second picture has a question which let’s you know immediately that even though these two pictures may look the same, they are not. The instructions say, “What’s different about these two pictures?” You then are given opportunity to find and list the items that are missing from the second picture that are evident in the first one.
My younger brother is very successful in law enforcement. I am amazed at his ability to pay attention to the slightest details. He has the ability to walk into a situation and tell you not what is present, but what is not present. What’s missing is often the clue that leads to a case being solved. Myself, I would probably end up exhausting myself studying the clues and items that were left at the scene of a crime rather than understanding what is different or missing from the scene.
Here is the problem many churches in our present day have. There is something missing and we haven’t figured out what it is yet. We are studying what is in front of us, but we can’t figure out why we are not having the kind of revival we know our Lord wants us to have.
We see people’s lack of involvement. We see the lack of dedication to the House of God. We know that the growth of our congregations are not keeping up with the population growth of our communities. People come to church with an “Entertain Me” attitude that lacks the fundamental hunger that is needful in a revival church.
We want to identify with the biblical New Testament church but the picture that was the Original Church is in many ways very different than the picture that is the modern day church.[ read more...]
God provides for us so that we might in turn protect what he has given us. Our God entrusts us to live within our financial means and ability. To live outside this ability, jeopardized the provisions of the family.
God owns everything but he gives us the use of it all. As we can be further trusted, he entrusts us with more. We become the managers of his blessings and provisions. If we cann't be trusted with what we have, how do we expect God to trust us with more? The management and care of God’s provisions is critical to future blessings.
According to Matthew 25:15-27, God expects dividends and a return on his investment. If we do not properly care for it and squander it, then we can expect to be cut off from the continued blessings of God. Luke gave us a clear indication of this in Luke 16:10 as he stated that the person who is faithful in little things is an indicator of faithfulness in larger things.
While earthly things are temporal, we still have to live here on earth. God gives us everything we need to live, survive, and enjoy the fullness of life. We must care for it with all diligence.[ read more...]
One of the saddest occurrences is when I spend time trying to mentor an experienced Christian minister who is wrestling with regrets, guilt and self-condemnation after they have given a lifetime to the work of God.
Christian ministry should be satisfying and rewarding. The joy, peace, fulfillment and contentment should be overflowing for anyone who has devoted their life to arguably the world’s most noble profession. Surprisingly instead of entering a time of bliss and contentment, a vast number of ministers and their spouses enter their later years disillusioned, angry, bitter, depressed and saddened over missed opportunities, mistakes, bad judgments, regrets, and a list of similar discouragements.
This simply ought not to be.
What about you? Are you living with regret, guilt, or condemnation right now?
Is it easier for you to quote Romans 8:1 than it is to live it?
“There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.”
The word “condemnation” means an adverse sentence (the verdict). There should be no adverse sentence or condemnation but reality says there often is. If so, then the question is what caused it? Or, from where did it originate?
Even if you could identify the point of origin for your feeling of condemnation you cannot change the history that caused it. However, you can learn from history, make adjustments, and not repeat the same mistakes in the future. Another key point is that Romans 8:1 reveals the answer to living condemnation free. It says to, “walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.” To state it plainly: the Spirit will lead you to a condemnation free life and ministry whereas the flesh will lead to condemnation.
From a practical standpoint the following suggestions will assist you in building a condemnation free life and ministry.
Plan your finances as though you will live 150 years. One of the greatest tragedies is that many of us have failed to plan for the day of retirement. It is a mistake you will live to regret. Many of those who chose to spend it all because the Lord was coming and they didn’t want to leave it for the antichrist died broke and foolish. They had no oil in their lamps when the day came that they needed it.[ read more...]
Twelve questions to keep your personal accounts in order.
- Am I content with who I am becoming? Every day I get one day closer to who I will ultimately be. Am I satisfied with who this will be?
- Am I becoming less religious and more spiritual? The difference: I can control religion, while spirituality controls me.
- Does my family recognize the authenticity of my spirituality? If I am growing spiritually, my family will recognize it.
- Do I have a flow-through philosophy? As a Christian I am to let the blessings flow through me to others.
- Do I have a quiet center to my life? There is an important difference between the fast track and the frantic track. Peace is the evidence of God.
- Have I defined my unique ministry? Unless you know the things you can do uniquely well, you end up doing many mediocre things just to please others.
- Is my prayer life improving? One test is: Do my decisions have prayer as an integral part, or do I make decisions out of my desires and then pray?